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15 minutes earlier, Oregon, 1848:
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Finally. They were in Oregon. And even better, they got to go skinny dipping! Craphole Dikrats was excited, but since his grandfather, Titty-Mitty Dikrats, had died of dysentery, everyone had to stay in this quarantine thing at the border of Oregon for as long as the doctor at the border wanted them to, so he could 'make sure they didn't have it', although Craphole was pretty sure it was actually because he fancied his mother, Slippery-When-Wet Dikrats, but anyways, they were finally free! As soon as they were let out, which was earlier that day, Jack Bauer, Craphole's father, had finally given in and found the nearest lake. Craphole had immediately stripped and jumped in, and had already been splashing around for hours, naked in the lake. Jack Bauer had left to try and find a place to live. Slippery-When-Wet and Mouthface, Craphole's fifteen year old sister, had gotten out after only half an hour, and were sunbathing in nothing but their undergarments, and both were currently asleep, and decently sunburned, but not at all tan.
Craphole dove under the water and grabbed a turtle that had grabbed his attention. It looked like a snapping turtle, but the seven year old didn't know what a snapping turtle even was, much less what they looked like. Still holding the turtle, the seven year old child swam around collecting rocks. He was kicking around underwater, when a pretty blue swirly thing popped up in front of the boy.
"Ooh! Pretty!" He said, though it came out as bubbles. Craphole reached out with his free hand, and right before he touched it, the turtle bit him, and swam off at a very fast speed for a turtle. Craphole shook it off, not noticing the large red cloud that now existed in the water, coming from a deep looking gash in his hand. He touched the swirling thing, and got sucked in, then promptly passed out.
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Paranormal, Extraterrestrial, and Interdimensional Phenomena
FanficGeneral John McNamara is annoyed. He is on a case, an important one, with his assistant and trainee, Curt Mega, but suddenly a portal opened up. Now, the general is no stranger to portals, but usually, they don't bring anything good. The last portal...
