Life as a Minecraft Mob

Zombie pigman

(Translated from Oink-grunt)

Being a zombie pigman is pretty boring, to tell the truth. Half the time there isn't even anything to do but play rounds of poker until somebody loses all their gold nuggets.

But it's better than being something like a magma cube. Most of the time, the players don't attack us, because once one of us gets attacked, we all team up against the attacker and they get slaughtered. So usually we get left alone.

Sometimes I think that I was better off being a pig. Sure, it was also pretty boring, but it was beautiful.

You need to really appreciate the days you live on the overworld. I miss nature... all the pigs and the cows and all the... sheep and stuff... I didn't think I'd miss it, but I do.

The sky was beautiful. The trees were beautiful. The ground was beautiful.

And the most beautiful of all - the water. Cool, fresh, soothing water. Much different to the lava we have here in the nether. Here in hell.

That's right. Hell. The nether is hell for pigs, a gathering of all the dead pigs that have been slain by one way or the other.

And guess what the most common cause of death is? That's right. Humans. They kill us harmless, defenceless pigs just for a bit of meat. And that gives us an eternity in hell to enjoy.

Oh, unless you kill us again. In that case, nobody knows what happens. Most think that you respawn as pigs again.

But life (or death) here in the nether is still really boring. Sure, as a pig we would be sure to get killed one way or another, but as I said before, it was beautiful.

We didn't have a care in the world, up there, in the overworld. We were ignorant, and happy. Eating grass, chasing each other around, laughing and squealing with glee.

But then you humans had to ruin everything! Murdering us mercilessly, and ridding us of our paradise and taking us to hell!

Please. If you see a pig, and you're not that hungry, then think twice before slaying it. We have lives too.