[ᴇᴅɪᴛɪɴɢ] 𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐂𝐄𝐃 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 || 𝐲𝐨𝐨𝐧 𝐣𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐠𝐡𝐚𝐧

33

IMPORTANT!!
Anyone who is good at digital art, can you make me a book cover? I feel like a book cover that'll attract more readers would definitely help sky rocket my writing. If you're interested please message me! If I end up using your design, I'll definitely give credits to you in the description box and in the prologue chapter!!
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NOT EDITED!
✨I'm literally astonished right now. How in the hell did we reach 8k reads—
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Kind of scary how well this book is progressing so quickly,, all I hope is this book is to your guys satisfaction.
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Also I know I'm a day late but HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO BIG BOI MINGYU !!! 🎉 ✨
~AU👁👄👁

     My mind was racing after I woke up in the same bed. The time was past three. My parents were ringing up my phone, a constant buzzing minute after minute. My lips were swollen, and man, did my eyes and head ever just hurt. I was punching myself in the face, painted on my fist were regret and pain. Why the hell did I kiss Jeonghan? Fuck! It was that stupid moment of weakness.

     I could only focus on what happened. Still just running through my head, like a song that didn't have a stop button.

~~~~

~~~RECOMMEND; 16+~~~
scroll past until check Mark if you don't wish to read this part.

     The small gap soon closed as our lips connected. A slowly paced was the speed of our lips. Saving the flavor of eachothers mouths. The kiss soon started to heat as I lift my leg up to straddle him. We just kept kissing as his hands reached for my waist squeezing tightly. It felt right. In that moment, I felt like I needed this. Like I need him. To enchanted by the kiss, I failed to notice his sudden pause. I kept kissing him, begging him to respond to me. Poking my tongue out of my lips, begging for entrance.

     Instead all I felt was his hands on my cheeks, pulling my face back. My faces only pigment was red, which expressed my desire to be touched, and I could tell by where I was sitting, he was desired the same thing. We were both filled with lust, our hormones were driving us insane. At least that's what I thought. It was driving me insane. I wanted anyone and that someone who was closest was Jeonghan. He just smiled, placed small kisses underneath my jaw, to my neck, to my collarbone. A small moan escaping my lips. "Let's not do anything today."

     "Stop fucking teasing me Jeonghan. I know you want it as much as I do—" he placed his finger to my lips, shutting me up instantaneously. He smirked, shaking his head.

     "You're wrong. I want this more, I've always wanted this... but I'm not the type to take advantage of someone in their weakest moment—"

     "Have you ever thought that I wanted to be taken advantage of? To get the whole thing of my mind? So let's continue—" I ignore his words. Moving my hips, grinding on his clothed legs. I earned a groan from Jeonghan. His breath hitting against my neck. That caused shivers to run down my entire body.

     Jeonghan let out a chuckled moan as he gripped tightly onto my hips to stop my movements. "Don't do that, you're making this very hard Y/N." Jeonghan paused, letting a sigh out of his lips. "You and I both know that's a lie, you're only saying that because you're horny. Let's just lay down and sleep, okay?"

     I eventually nodded my head, feeling a little bummed. I wanted to be touched. He wasn't giving me that at all. It's nothing I can do though, I'm not going to force him to do it with me, or guilt him into doing it either. I'm not a rapist.

     We just laid there, my fingers playing around on some fabrics under the blanket. Jeonghan froze, his whole body stiffened under me as I laid on his chest. What's wrong with him, I kept thinking. "Y-Y/N... you're touching my dick—"

~~~END OF FLASHBACK~~~

     I grabbed my forehead. Regretting everything. What the hell was I thinking?! Why did I have no control? I was so lust-bound til the point I failed to see my actions. Now I'm stuck with embarrassment and regret. I tried to think of ever possible excuse, yet I couldn't find one that fit. I wasn't intoxicated. He didn't force me, instead I was the one who initiated it... I'd be lying if I blamed it all on lust anyways... it felt nice. It was bound to happen even if there wasn't lust. Still pisses me the fuck off. I reach over for my phone, a green stick note facing up towards the ceiling. I rip the note off, staring at his writing... he was beautiful penmanship.

     "I'm sorry, I had to leave. I had a few classes. I'll message you when I'm off.
          - Jeonghan"

     I crumpled up the thin flimsy piece of wood with my fist and threw it farthest away from me. Watching the small paper pall hit against the wall and then land on the floor. I held my forehead. I can't do this. My phone was still ringing. I picked up, it was my mother. I pressed the green button, a loud scream making into my ears. Fear filled my insides, quickly placing the phone to my ear. "Mama? Mama! Are you alright? What's wrong?"

     "Oh! Thank goodness! I thought something happened to you!" I sighed out of relief. The thought of something happening to my precious mom scared me. "Stupid! Why would you scream like that?! You scared me to death!"

     "Sorry, my baby. I was just surprised that you answered. I kept calling you for hours straight. There was no respond..." she paused, she breathed heavily. Debating with herself if she should ask me what happened. Eventually she got the courage to ask. "Y/N... what happened last night? We saw your bedroom, it was a complete disaster... not to forget the blood stains on the floor..."

     I couldn't say anything. I didn't want too. I couldn't make my parents upset. Didn't want to worry them either. My selfish selfless thoughts were keeping me from everyone. It felt necessary. So once again, I lied. It feels like lying has become a common thing to me now. Everything I spout is a lie. It angers me. "...I'm fine. Nothing happened—"

     "Stop lying, Y/N! I'm your mother, I know when somethings wrong!" For the first time, she yelled. She's never yelled. She was furious. Still I couldn't find it in my room tell her anything.

     "Everything's been handled. There's nothing for you to worry about." I answer slightly coldly, wanting to end this call so badly.

     "...I'm your mother. I'm suppose to worry, you stupid child." I could hear a sob escape her lips, guilt hitting my once again in the face. I bit my lip, hard. I could taste the metallic flavor of my blood that gushed out. I was out of words. Instead I could only utter out an sincere apology.

     "I'm sorry... I'm not able to tell you, mama." My finger collided with the phone. I waited for her to say something.

"I'm disappointed, Y/N." With that, the phone call ended. Now Im going to feel ashamed of showing my face to her.