Pain | Namjin

~ 26 ~

3rd point of view
♧︎ Kim Seokjin ♧

"That's funny. I recognize this scene."

     "What the hell is wrong with you?" Namjoon whispered, his eyes watering as he tried to glare at Seokjin, but failing terribly.

     Seokjin just stared. He stared at the scene as if he's the audience of a horror movie. He flipped back to reality once Namjoon got up and started walking to the exit, Namjoon's right hand was massaging his throat where you could see a very visible red line.

   Seokjin tried stopping him, tried apologizing, begging him for forgiveness but all he got was the silent treatment. He understood why though, who would ever forgive someone who choked you, threw you on the ground with a threat following along. He's been in the same situation before, he understood what Namjoon was feeling.

   But he had an excuse, right? He was abused, nothing more than that. He was just coping. Yeah, treating others the same way your abusive brother and dad treated you can help you throughout the process of forgetting. He just had to explain it to Namjoon. Would he forgive him though? Even with all the explaining? Did he already know was Jimin was doing to him? They were together for quite a while. With Jimin visiting regularly he sure had to figure out something to talk about. Would he even tell Namjoon the correct story though? Nono of course not, Namjoon wouldn't have let him in his home if he had told him the correct story. Just explain. Explaining is the best possible solution.

   But when he blinked back to reality though the car was gone. And so was Namjoon.

  Fuck.

  How stupid can he be to zone out in a middle of an argument? He shouldn't have thought about excuses for his behavior and instead try giving an actual apology. He imagined how stupid he must've looked, begging for forgiveness one second then going silent the next.

   Seokjin tried calling afterward, holding one hand on his hip with the look of guilt in his eyes. He prayed that Namjoon would answer, but it was no use, it went straight to voicemail. Namjoon turned off his phone.

The cold breeze of the evening was blowing on his face. Seokjin looked up to see the moon rising, and the clouds getting darker. He thought about how he could've spent this time with Namjoon. Would they be cooking dinner? Watching a movie? Maybe cuddling while watching a movie.

After calling for what seemed like 10 minutes, Seokjin gave up and went inside. It was too late to go back home so he planned to stay the night at the vacation house and try to give a proper apology to Namjoon in the morning. That is if he will open the door.

  Seokjin laid in bed staring at the ceiling, He wonders what happened to his father, to Jimin. He had beaten them quite a lot, and as much as they deserved it he was still worried. Did Jimin go home to find their dad laying unconscious on his office floor? Did he even go home? Maybe he went to the hospital. Then that would mean his father is still laying there. Maybe he woke up and called 119, maybe he's getting treated with Jimin at the same time.

  He shut away his thoughts about his broken family and switched his mindset to the only thing that mattered. Namjoon. He thought about the male as he dipped his hand inside his pajama bottoms, wrapping his hand around his cock. He thought about how he looked shoved against the wall, Seokjin's hand on his throat and his pupils wide with shock. He closed his eyes and thought about their time in the car. Namjoon's whimpers, his mouth open wide as he bucked his hips upwards as a sign to keep going. His mouth spilling out words to keep a bit of his ego. Fuck. It was all too much.

    He came with a grunt. Seokjin sat up and threw the dirty blanket away, and walked up to get a fresh clean one from the closet.

  He laid back down on the firm mattress, wrapping himself up in the fluffy blanket, and tried to go to sleep. He failed badly though, instead, he went through the night with his head banging and eyes wide with worry.