Paint Me Red

24. Too Good To Be Mine

Previously on PMR

"El-" he began to say but I cut him off.

"NO! WHY DON'T YOU GET IT?! HOW CAN YOUR FAMILY EVEN STAND TO LOOK AT ME? I'VE KNOWN THAT UGLY TRUTH FOR A YEAR NOW AND I HAVE CARRIED THE BURDEN OF IT IN MY CHEST SINCE THEN! I'VE BETRAYED YOU!" I lashed out at him and took two steps away.

"How could you want to be with me? Or even look at my face? Why?" I whispered in a broken voice and felt my throat clog even more.

"BECAUSE I FUCKING LOVE YOU!"

---

Ignazio's POV:

Pin drop silence.

I stared at her for some sort of reaction but she stood there unmoving and unblinking as if she had seen a ghost.

I swallowed the ball of nerves that was now beginning to clog my throat and took a step in her direction to elicit any reaction.

She looked up at me, slowly, and a pained look crossed her features.

"Ho-why?" she whispered.

"I can't control my feelings, Ellaria. And who wouldn't fall for a woman like you?" I countered.

"You're a fool." She said and shook her head.

"I could be your fool if you accept me." I pleaded.

"Ignazio." She whispered my name with uncertainty swimming in her eyes.

"Ellaria, for fuck's sake, we can't be back to square one." I said and snaked my hand around her waist to pull her closer.

She placed both of her hands on my chest, trying to create some distance but I didn't let her.

"I knew about Mateo." She told once again as if I hadn't heard the first time.

"You had no part in it, Ellaria. Don't fuckin' take the blame for something that isn't your fault."

She sighed, "And what? Dream of a happily ever after with you?"

"Is it so bad?"

"It's not bad at all and maybe that is the problem."

"Your father, when I get my hands on him, he will pay for it. But you shouldn't be walking around with burdens that are not for your shoulders to support."

She gulped audibly and averted her gaze elsewhere. Up close, she looked even more drained and exhausted. Her eyes were two large pools of hollowness with no marked boundaries.

It physically hurt me to see her like that I would trade anything just to take it all away from her. She lost her sister and I know how it feels to lose a sibling which is why I don't want her feeling this way.

"I have Ebenezer and a crazy family, you will eventually see me for who I really am and I really am not ready for any more heartbreaks."

"And who exactly are you?"

"Just a broken, lying, and silly woman who has lost all sense of direction in her life."

I scoffed in disbelief, "No, Ellaria, what you are is an amazing sister, a talented and hardworking girl, a great mother, and an even better friend."

"Lies."

"You gave me a chance, Ellaria. I am still holding on to it."

"Let go."

"I wish it were that easy," I replied, brushing my knuckles on her cheeks. "And about Ebenezer, he will live with us. What makes you think I or my family won't welcome him? Ellaria, if you're a mother to him then I would love to be called his father."

A million emotions passed her eyes as she finally let her tears fall and I brought her head to my chest, letting her sob.

As painful as it was, she needed to let it all out.

"I- she's gone. I didn't even get a chance to tell her how much I have loved her ever since I've brought her home that day. She knew about it, she knew that I was her sister but she never once brought it up. I deeply regret it, not telling her when I had the time to." She sobbed out.

I could feel myself tearing up a bit at her state but I controlled my emotions for her sake.

"I wish I had gotten more time with her because I had planned to tell her after her homecoming." She whispered as she pulled away to look at me.

Tears adorned her face and the sun shining directly on them made them look like something magical. As if they had a power of their own, a world of their own.

But that was a world of pain and I would die before letting her live in that.

"She loved you despite everything." I reassured her.

"And yet I did not get to tell her the same."

My heart clenched at the absolute agony behind her words.

"You can't fight destiny, Ellaria. Marianne was proud to have a sister like you by her side. She looked up to you and she loved you even at that moment. Otherwise, she would never have wanted to sacrifice herself willingly."

"I wish I was in her place."

A strong force hit my chest like a punch and my breathing hitched, "No." I whispered selfishly.

"If I can get one more moment with her, I'd tell her how much proud I was of her and how happy her achievements always made me. She was my family, Ignazio. I'd die for her but I'll also kill for her." She stated and her voice became void of emotions by the end while her face turned stone cold.

"He'll pay." I said in all seriousness.

He will pay for all the crimes he has committed. He will pay for betraying the ones who gave him the life he was living now.

"I don't get it, Ignazio. Who could have told him that they both were alone? It can't only be because they were keeping tabs on us. It's like they strategized the plan as if they knew our moves beforehand."

I have been thinking about the same thing ever since last night and after much thought, I could only come up with one conclusion.

A mole.

There was an inside person who was trading information to them.

And a person who was extremely close to us.

"We'll find out soon enough, amore. For now, I want you to come home with me and rest."

She nodded her head and pulled away gently before I grabbed her hand and we started to walk out of the cemetery.

As soon we settled inside the car, I checked the rearview mirror to see the security hot on our heels and I turn to look at her as a thought pops up in my head.

"And Ellaria," I called her name and waited for her to bring her attention to me.

She looked at me with a small frown and I continued, "You're too good to be mine."

A/N: Yep, I'm back. No this book isn't dead. Sorry for updating after a whole year. 😔😔 Yep, it's been that long. I last updated in April 2020. But, I also completed two other books in that span so um sorry?