Tender (A britpop era fiction)

Some Might Say I

I wanted to write this chapter later, as it is something to explain why Claire and Noel don't talk anymore. But now, I'm far too drunk and I miss my own sister far too much right now, I haven't seen her in almost six months thanks to the global pandemic you might've heard of.

And I'm really far too drunk as I already said. And sad. I might've cried a bit while writing this. Sibling dynamic always kills me. I can't wait to write a chapter with Noel and Liam one day.

And now I'm going to watch Maine Road and drink a bit more and probably cry a bit more. 

Next chapter is either going to be present day Claire and Damon again or finally the Gallagher interview I still owe you.

And before I forget it: All of you are really something else. Best readers and followers ever. I love every bit I hear from you and I'm really, really fuckin thankful for it. 

Lots of love and feel hugged,

Sally, x. 

"Ya kiddin."

"I'm not" I say and try to look him in the eye without melting in shame under his cold gaze. "Tony asked me to marry him."

Noel looks at me with an open mouth, before he jumps up, bringing as much distance between us as he can.

"And you said yes" he states matter-of-factly, his tone not matching his facial expression at all. He looks like he's been hit by a truck.

"I did." Tears dwell up in my eyes.

"Oh for fucks sake" he curses and turns to the window, shaking his head, before he turns around to me again. The disappointment in his face kills me. "Jesus fuckin' Christ, ya really serious?"

I only nod, already sobbing.

"I want to marry him, I really do" I stutter, not able to look up to him one second longer. 

"Claire!" he bursts out frustrated. "Stop fuckin' bullshitting me! Look at yourself!"

"Please, be happy for me. Noelie..."

"Happy?" he goes off. "Fuckin' happy? You just came in and emptied a whole plate within a minute just to chuck it up again! The last time you did this-" He stops all of a sudden, remembering that if he continues he's touching something he can't lock away again. 

"And you want me to be happy for you?"

Yes. I need him to be happy for me. I don't know how to do myself.

"I will not? Ya hear me? I will fuckin' not! You're not even happy yourself!" Noel stands by the window in helpless, bristling frustration. 

"I am" I lie and nothing's ever sound more shallow. "I am, I am, I-"

"No, Cla" Noel interupts me firmly. "You can fool anyone in this world and you're the master at fooling yourself. But ya can't fool me. You're not happy. I can see it. I've seen it for a while now."

I swallow the strangled scream threatening to built in my throat. He can't be right. I'll not allow him to be right, not this time. 

"I can be happy again with him. I know I can."

"You are out of your fuckin' mind! Jesus fuckin' Christ!" Noel shakes his head furiously. "Ya can't marry a guy you don't even-" 

"I do" I sob. I'm clinging to the bedsheets while tears streem down my face. "I really, really fuckin' do!"