BxB Cashby Healed My Heart (Completed)

Chapter 9

I tried to call Austin four times and I left him multiple text messages. But he didn't answer. I didn't want to overbear him so I didn't bother him anymore that night. I was so confused as to what was so bad about the date but I just couldn't figure it out.

I was a little bit hurt that he didn't trust me with telling me what happened on the 15th of March considering I'd poured my heart out to him. Why was it okay for me to be open, yet I still knew very little about him? I shouldn't be making this about me when he's clearly upset about something. I just wish he could trust me...

He opened up to me about his...attempt. So why couldn't he open up why this date is so significant?

I checked my phone every 10 minutes to see if he would reply but he never did. Before I knew it, it was 6:00am and I'd gotten no sleep. I was exhausted and I felt like I just needed to collapse. There was no way in hell I could go to school feeling like this. Yes, I know it was my fault for not sleeping but I was too concerned about Austin to sleep. But I would just fall asleep if I went to school.

"Alan, honey?" My mom called from outside, "Are you awake?"

"Mom, I feel really bad..." I told her, "I don't think I can go to school..."

My door opened then and she walked in with concern written over her face.

"You do look peaky," She put her hand on my forehead, "Your temperature's fine but I think you should stay off for today."

"Thank you," I replied but I could already feel my eyes closing.

I was fast asleep before she'd walked out of my room.

***

I woke up about five hours later and the first thing I did was check my phone. Nothing. I sighed in annoyance but I knew there was no way I could go back to sleep now. He seemed really upset last night and I didn't want him to be down about anything. All I wanted was to help him but how could I do that if he wouldn't even answer my texts?

I sat up and stretched my tense muscles before jumping in the shower. After I cleaned myself, I got changed and grabbed something to eat. I considered maybe just playing guitar for a while but I couldn't sit down and relax. Whenever I had a lot on my mind, I would normally go for a walk and it seemed the perfect opportunity considering everyone would still be at school.

I grabbed my house key before venturing off into the direction of the woods. I took out my cell as I walked debating whether or not to call him. Maybe he was just sick of me? Should I just get the hint and leave him alone?

Oh my God. Maybe I was the problem. I mean...it kind of makes sense. He wouldn't tell me more about him because he wasn't planning on me being in his life for that long. We'd only known each other 2 months and he was already pushing me away. It didn't take even 2 months for someone to get sick of me. I knew this would happen. I'm just a burden. I'm not worth anyone's time.

My lip started to quiver and I collapsed on the forest floor. Why did I let myself get close to him? I knew by letting someone in, I was just making myself more vulnerable. This would have hurt if I only saw him as friend but the fact that I had a crush on him just made everything more painful. I don't blame him for pushing me away...It's not like I really bought anything to the friendship. I just wish that he had told me that he didn't want anything more to do with me instead of just ignoring me.

Oh. He did tell me. He tried to do it nicely but I practically forced him to still be my friend. Yesterday, when I told him about my mom he said that he didn't want our friendship to come in the way of me and my family. Maybe, he was trying to end our friendship then.