Paint the Town Red

New York Vigilantes

Peter has created the New York Vigilante Group Chat

Peter has added Felicia Hardy, Matt Murdock, Jessica Jones, Luke Cage, Danny Rand, Logan

Peter has changed Felicia Hardy to Felicia

Peter has changed Matt Murdock to Matt

Peter has changed Jessica Jones to Jess

Peter has changed Luke Cage to Luke

Peter has changed Danny Rand to Danny

New York Vigilantes Group Chat

Peter: Hello everyone! Welcome to the vigilante group chat!

Peter: Don't add anyone without consulting this chat first.

Felicia: sweet

Danny: lmao can we connect this to Minecraft?

Matt: No.

Peter: yes

Felicia: yes

Danny: yes

Peter: ur outnumbered dad

Peter: *matt

Felicia: devildad

Matt: Shush, child.

Luke: please do not connect this to minecraft

Peter: roblox?

Luke: that's even worse

Jess: connect it to minecraft

Matt: I-

Luke: u play minecraft?

Jess: no, i just want to see u suffer

Logan: why am i part of this?

Peter: ur our liason to x men

Logan: u have angelica for that

Peter: she's not a vigilante

Logan: and im canadian, not from new york

Peter has changed the group chat name to New York Vigilantes + 1 Canadian

Peter: happy?

Logan: it's a start

Jess: Peter has offended me

Peter: what?

Matt: What is it this time?

Jess: he's a nerd

Luke: everyone and their grandma knows that

Peter: ...is that a compliment?

Danny: u have 5 shirts with the periodic table on them

Peter: stfu, u of all people can't critique my fashion sense

Danny: excuse me?

Peter: ur shoulder fins and ballet shoes are ugly af

Danny: i-

Luke: ROASTED

Danny: wow

Danny: i'm being personally victimized

Felicia: whatever u say regina george

Felicia: so, what did peter do?

Jess: he was drinking a slushie

Jess: but a pigeon scared him, and he slurped too much

Jess: instead of saying "Brain freeze"

Jess: HE YELLED NEURAPALPATINE GANGLIONEURALGAE

Peter: *Sphenopalatine Ganglioneuralgia

Jess: silence nerd

Felicia: yesterday morning, i went into peter's room to wake him up bcuz i needed his first aid kit

Felicia: in his sleep, he was muttering "The mitochondria are the powerhouses of the cell."

Felicia: At. One. AM. In. The. MORNING.

Peter: stop judging me D:

Matt: It's okay Peter, we still love you.

Danny: #devildad

Matt: *sigh*

Peter Parker to Matt Murdock

Peter: hey matt

Matt: Hi Peter.

Matt: What's up?

Peter: i had a question

Matt: Shoot.

Peter: does it really bother u that much when people call u my dad?

Matt: Of course not.

Matt: I didn't always have the best relationship with my dad while growing up, then I lost him when I was 8.

Matt: Plus, I know how much your Uncle Ben meant to you, and I wasn't entirely sure if you'd appreciate me trying to fill his shoes.

Peter: that's the longest text i've ever read

Peter: so, um, i don't do that well with emotions with adults

Peter: except aunt may, but

Peter: you're like a dad to me, and i appreciate that u haven't tried to fill in my uncle's shoes

Peter: but you've helped me a lot :)

Peter: andiwaskindofwonderingifyouwouldmaybewanttocometomysciencefairbecauseauntmaycantmakeit

Matt: Uh.

Matt: Can you add some spaces?

Peter: i was wondering if you could come to my science fair tomorrow because aunt may can't make it

Matt: Of course!

Peter: yay

Peter: ∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿

Matt: Please never make that face again.

Peter: fine

New York Vigilantes + 1 Canadian

Felicia : peter has a crush on johnny storm

Comment deleted by Peter

Danny: OMG

Luke: peter, what is it with u and billionaire boys?

Peter: what does that mean?

Jess: ur best friends with harry osborn

Jess: danny's ur self-appointed older brother

Jess: and now ur dating johnny storm

Peter: we're not dating

Felicia: i beg to differ

Peter: goodbye

Peter has left the chat