Custom Made For You

Chapter 70- More Opening Up And Talking

  "Airi, you really shouldn't joke about something like this. People will misunderstand, you know?" I squeezed a smile from my face as best as I could.

She sighed, "Figured you'd say this. Anyway, I was serious. I liked you that way before, just wanted you to know."

"But why now though?"

"Hm? Just, felt like it was about time. Don't worry, I don't feel like that towards you anymore. I just thought you deserved to know and my dead feelings at least needed some acknowledgement or something to really be dead. Nothing much, I've let go and that's that."

Which was true, I think, because when I looked at her, a sort of relief was written on her face, no other emotions were present, it was just...Airi, a peaceful Airi. I don't know if she still had anything she hadn't told me, or maybe she was hiding, it really doesn't matter, I chose to believe her, might as well stick with it. It's not like I didn't understand that some things need time, I should be clearer than anyone.

"Why so quiet? Shocked?"

I didn't answer, I didn't know how to. I just kept looking at her, only noticing how well her hazel eyes complimented her isabelline skin or how well it matched her coopery hair.

"Don't worry, you're like a brother to me. I love you, not as a friend, but as family."

Family. Family...huh?

It felt odd, but the good kind.

"Anyway" ─ she grabbed my hand ─ "Good job on finally getting what you deserve for the longest time. A stable job and a love life. That's a really big accomplishment."

She opened her arms, waiting for me to close up the space.

The sadness seeped through her mask of congrats, no matter how hard she tried to hide it, I could tell. Yet, some things are better unsaid, some truths are better covered. I guess that could be applied to my childhood memory loss, its better I didn't know, I wasn't ready, my brain knew that too.

I crashed into Airi's arms. Deep down I knew Airi probably needed this, this sort of affection. Her body was cold, but there was an undertone of warmth under that chill.

She patted me on the back, "This is some good stuff right here. Fuck therapy."

I let out a snicker, "I mean, do you need therapy?"

"Maybe."

"Then, don't fuck therapy just yet. You should get professional help if you need it. Who suggested it anyway?"

"Vastel, who else?"

Oh, yeah, low-key forgot that he's a psychologist.

"I can't remember is Vastel a psychologist or a psychiatrist again?" she asked.

"I'll have you know that I'm very much a psychologist, and also, a nurse is here for you," Vastel's voice sent every cell of my body on high alert mode.

Airi pushed me away, shouting, "How did you come in so quietly? Do you just go through the walls? You a ghost? What the hell?"

"This is a hospital lower your voice and you were so engrossed in that little hug of yours you didn't hear me, that's how," he said, signaling the nurse holding an IV bag to get to work. "Your doctor is busy with a surgery right now. So here I am."

"You're gonna be Ai's psychologist or something then?" I stood beside Vastel.

The nurse touched Airi's IV bag, nodding to herself and started the procedure to replace the bag. Vastel shook his head, "I can't be even if I wanted to be, she's a friend, as a professional medical, that's a big no."

"That's a rule?"

"Yeah, no feelings involved, gotta keep things professional."

The nurse looked at Vastel once she was finish, in a way, signalling him to go with her.

"I have something to give both you and Lulu, come by our place later, he knows too, told him on the way here," Vastel said, before bidding his farewell (Oddly formal but he did literally say the word 'Farewell' when he left.).

"Well, he has a lot of free time for a doctor, huh?" Airi called out.

I shrugged, "I mean, he's probably just concerned. Who knows, maybe he just came to check up on you just in case you were to do something like wheelchair-ing down the hallway or maybe steal other patients' stuff."

"I don't exactly have the mood for those, if I'm honest. I know that's not very me, but, y'know, waking up after a 24-hour nap isn't the best for your back and your brain," she stretched her arms, I could hear bones cracking from where I stood.

"Nap? That was a full on coma, Ai. Take your meds, alright?"

"I just...forgot, okay? That old bitch was coming, I was stressed, you know how I'm like when I'm stressed. I still can't believe I outed you in front of her and I'm still not sure if I had the right to say what I had said. After all, she did raise me up, regardless the fact that she didn't exactly do the best she could."

"Hey, listen, I can't say much about parents, I'm the one with very dead parents. But, as a friend, I'm telling you, if you would feel better after what you had done, then it's alright, it's like you finally let go of some of that heavy burden you've held on for so long. If happiness means you have to let go toxic parents, so be it. It's your happiness, you won't always choose the right path, but if that path seems like it's the best for you for the time being, why not give it a go?"

"So, instincts?"

"Yeah, just go with that gut, you'd do fine. You've always followed your guts, no?"

She looked at me, those eyes, while clouded with helplessness, had a small sliver of hope once more.

"Why are you guys looking at each other like that?" The door swung open, Luzien was not breathing properly.

"Did you like, run?" Airi looked over my shoulder.

"Yes, and I had to carry all this stuff with me," he panted, setting down a bag way too big for drinks. Airi did not even wait for him to say another word and started to look in the bag.

"Half of this isn't even what I asked for, dude," she remarked, pulling out a lot of food out from the bag.

"Yeah, well, Vastel did say that the hospital food isn't the best, so I got you some food, just in case," he said, hugging me from behind. I tried my best not to jolt from his touch, I really wanted to tell him personal space is still a thing, but he looked like he needed it.

"Lulu, Tol's personal space," Airi said it for me, with her mouth already full of some random pastry.

"Ah, sorry." The way he let go was a tinge disappointing, if I were to be honest, I knew it was forced and he was unwilling to let go, even when I did feel a lot more comfortable afterwards. I patted his hand, hoping that I had comforted him a little.

"Pretty good cinnamon bun, by the way, where'd you get it?" she ate, seemingly oblivious to what was happening between us.

"Uh, the bakery in front of the food court and convenient store," he answered.

"Why didn't you use your car anyway, jeez, you have one, no?"

"I thought it would have been quick until I met Vastel on the way out, so here we are. Do I have to answer any more questions? Visiting hours is about to end, and Tolmer and I have to get out of here," he said, holding my hand.

"Aw, leaving so soon? What are you guys going to do anyway?" she perked up, wriggling her eyebrows playfully.

I laughed at her smirk, I was actually glad she was being herself again, "We're not doing anything weird, you nasty."

"Just go, I don't need to see it. Come see me tomorrow, yeah?" she waved at us, showing us the door.

Maybe, just maybe she would be fine, you know?