Chapter 17- Tolmer.exe Has Stopped Working

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  I wanted to cry with actual tears, just so you know. I want to just rush back home and lock my ass in my toilet, cutting away the outside world.

"Hey, get in, there are cars behind me, silly," he said, with such a gentle tone, it was almost as if he didn't mind me kicking him out yesterday. That scared me. He was...too calm.

I got onto his car, feeling a little sorry that I had probably held up a few cars. "M-morning," I mumbled under my breath. He was humming to a song on the radio, his eyes were very much focused on the road. I peaked at him, I told myself, 'Just a little.'

I noticed that there were a few strands of hair sticking out from his gelled back hair, his almost flawless skin with no pores nor signs of acne, his brows were equal, it wasn't bushy or anything, it was, well, perfect, like the rest of him.

"Enjoying the view?" he suddenly turned his head, smiling, making direct eye contact with me. My heart nearly stopped, snapping my head to the window side, as I felt my face burning up like how fire would spread with spilled gasoline. "S-shut up, you're driving, concentrate."

He giggled, "Okay, but you can keep staring at my face though."

I hated myself at that point. I was confused, scared, weirded out, and embarrassed. I hated myself for not being careful enough, and for him to catch me red handed. I hated the mixed feelings, I hated the atmosphere, I hated not understanding, I hated not having any control over this, I hated everything.

A part of me knew I was grappling with something troublesome, something that was unknown to me. I wanted out, yet he was making it harder and harder by the moment. I did not even know the guy for a long time, we didn't have any emotional connection whatsoever. But, somehow, I wanted to know more of him, I wanted him to stay in my life.

I hadn't made any eye contact the entire ride, I did not even dare to glance at him. I was resisting-, trying my hardest to not get more. I was aware that I was getting quite greedy, I should have stopped then and there. After all, I had much more important things to deal with.

"Have you eaten yet?" He asked, after parking his car in front of a café. His eyes told me that he really wanted to have breakfast. What I couldn't understand was, why me?

I shook my head, he instantly got of off the car. He literally ran to my side and opened the door for me. Okay, I could have opened the door myself but it was pretty nice, I guess. (I felt fancy for a second there.)

He yanked my hand and dragged me into the café. Déjà vu? Is that what they call it? I summited to him anyway, it was better than going to work with an empty stomach.

"Let me treat you breakfast. It was wrong of me to not think about your personal space yesterday. Please don't be angry," he said quietly when we were sitting at a table. Woah, there, that caught me off guard. Did he think that it was his fault? I wanted to tell him so badly all that had happened, ad that it wasn't his fault, I really did. Yet, all that I managed to say was, "It's okay, I'm sorry too. It wasn't your fault,"

He perked up like how a puppy would when it's given treats, "Really?" Oh, gods, my heart. For just a second there, all my worries disappeared, like they were non-existent in the first place. It was as if my whole life I was waiting for his adorable smile. The only respond I could force out was, "Y-yeah..."

I felt bad for pushing him away, just...a little though... Yeah, I must have been confused. 

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