Sonya x reader

Without her

It had been almost two months.

We hadn't gotten Sonya back. Or anyone else. I found out that among Sonya was both Aris and Minho. The woman who had helped me save Brenda (Mary) had been shot and killed by none other than janson as were many others. I guess I just didn't realize until someone told me.

I had met Carlos. I very kind middle aged Hispanic with a thick accent and an incredible talent. We got along really well and he agreed to make me a mechanic hand.

The process of the prosthetic was painful. He had to connect little wires to the nerves in my arms. Somehow he made it detachable (Not really sure how it works.) because it wasn't water proof. But after about a week he had made me a new hand.

The machinery was exposed and silvery but and the tip of every finger was a small pad to resemble a finger print. The design was flawless and hardly ever malfunctioned.

Tortoise didn't like the new hand. I don't know. Maybe he thought it was possessed. And whenever I tried to pet him with it the wires would get tangled in his fur. So I avoided that.

I was so angry all the time. I was really only focused on finding Sonya. Who knew what cruel things wicked was doing to her. I put aside my own self and forgot to eat, sleep, I was constantly beating myself up and I had to keep trying to right my wrong.

I was too focused on trying to get her out that it never occurred to me that she may not even make it.

I tried to focus on the plan to get her back instead of worry.

We had come up with a few loose plans but none of them deemed safe enough for Vince. I didn't care if they were safe or not. I just wanted to get her back.

I was constantly lashing out and Harriet had to do breathing exercises with me on a daily.

Harriet was my only calm from the raging storm around me.

I tried to sympathize with her since she had in fact also lost her friends. She saw right through it. As she always does.

"Y/n. You don't have to pretend you're okay." She said

"I'm not trying to pretend not to feel ok, I'm trying not to lose my shit" I said back sighing and trying not to snap at the one person who was keeping me from going crazy and giving it all up.

She sighed and put her head on my shoulder giving up on verbally helping me. She knew I needed a hug so she pulled me into the longest hug I've ever had. But that was exactly what I needed then.

"Thank you." I whispered into her shoulder.

She hummed in response. She knew I needed that. She knows everything. The bastard saw right through everything.

"It's gonna be ok." She said. "We're going to find them." She said.

I thought she must be right since she was all wise or something and it comforted me.

"Let's get to work." Harriet said after maybe an hour of silent hugging.

I nodded. And took a deep breath.

I told myself not to yell at Vince today.

I told myself to just focus on finding a plan.

I told myself not to worry because she would be back soon.

I hope.

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I entered my cluttered room. It wasn't much of a room but more of a cement closet. It was a better room then most of the others got. Me and Harriet had been sharing it. Wind blew through the broken window. I crawled through it and climbed up onto the roof. As I sit down I put on sonyas jacket to keep me from the cool morning air.

She had left it behind and it was my main source of comfort in her absence.

I pulled open a granola bar and started munching on it.

I looked around me at the sky. It was a light blue and pink clouds floated about after the recent sunrise.

The cool air blew at my face and my hair swirled around. My eyes search the sky.

Once I finish my granola bar I wipe the crumbs off my face and shove the wrapper in my pocket.

What's that?

There was something else in the pocket. I rummage around until I find it again and pull it out.

In my hand is a crumpled piece of paper.

Slowly I spread it open. It's small. About six inches wide. Once it's fully unfurled I look at it.

Blank.

I flip it over and see the writing.

My heart stops.

On the paper I see the words: to y/n

I quickly read it.

To y/n

Hey. I don't think you'll ever read this. Not even sure if you're alive. Mary and Rachel we're the last people to talk to you. In the maze I mean. I wanted to hate Rachel so bad for pulling you in but she looked like she felt so guilty already. Mary talked on and on about how there was no way you could have died. She kept saying she heard you. We found the two monsters lying dead. Rachel said she killed them. Never asked how. And then we found the body. Amy. That was what scared me most. I didn't want to find you like that. But if I think about that I'll start crying and I'm so sick of crying in all honesty. So this is my way of coping I guess. I don't know. But it helps. Other then that I just wanted to say that I love you. And maybe that's weird since we've only known each other like a month but I feel like I've known you my whole life. I'd be lying if I said that I didn't. And that's the last thing I want to do. Lie. I hate liars.    That's all for now. Maybe I'll write more letters. I'm not sure.

Love Sonya.

Tears leaked all over my face. One thing had finally occurred to me.

Sonya said she loved me and I never had the chance to say it back.