He hasn't even written a message. No "I'm sorry", no good night, or good morning to start today on the right foot. Nothing, he did absolutely nothing.
I feel a lot of anger at his behavior, for the hours I have spent so far wondering if part of the fault was mine. Maybe it is, I don't rule it out, but why not write to me? Why ignore me so much?
And it all came at the worst moment, when I wondered if his unwillingness to introduce me to his parents didn't conceal insecurity in our relationship.
«Aurora is something wrong?» my mother asks from the table, seeing me enchanted staring at the flame of the stove.
«No mom, all right. Do you want coffee too, dad?»
«Yes, thanks.»
«Are you sure?» my mother still insists.
«Of course I am.»
«Are you going out with Marco today?»
From her tone, I understand that she's testing the ground. If I tell her no, she will start asking questions until she gets every little truth out of me.
«Yes, we should meet in the afternoon. It's a beautiful day and it's not even that cold, so I think we'll take a walk.»
I pour the coffee, thanking it for coming up just in time to defuse more questions.
I offer a cup to my father, waking him from the numbness in which the sofa had guided him.
When I get to my mother, she plays her ace.
«Thank you. Where did you say he went last night?»
«At dinner with his uncles.»
Fortunately, I keep the lies in mind. I must remember to warn Marco.
«Now I'm going to run on the beach for a while. Do you want to come?»
The first time she accepted, but she has never come since. Too tiring, she says.
«If we walk, yes.»
«No, sorry.»
---------------
The sound of the sea marks the scenes that follow one another in my mind.
The freedom to run alone, or to go out unsupervised, should be a right. But I had to gain everything, and I can't afford to lose it. Just as I can't, for a stupid misunderstanding or demand, dismiss the one who gave me normality.
He has always been loving, he gave me a group of friends, a love story, he made me understand what it means to be desired. As if that weren't enough, there are times when he even manages to convince me of what he says he sees.
Once home, I'll call him apologizing for my behavior.
I look around to make sure I'm alone.
The distance from home is more than enough, but it's always better to pay attention that there are no prying eyes. In a place like this, rumors run fast.
Certain that there is no one, I put my hand on a rock, catch my breath, and let the darkness emerge.
YOU ARE READING
Aurora's Shadow
RomanceAurora, forced into an eating disorder clinic at 17 years old, decides to find a compromise not to remain under observation. Her choices will lead her along a path full of lies, pain, unspoken anger, and false joys until, at the age of twenty, Tyler...
