always been mine - emily prentiss x reader

chapter sixty-three // when you wanna stop

tw: mentions of attempted rape

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"You give Mama a kiss?" you asked Maia with a big smile. She tried to wriggle out of your lap and Emily helped her over, so Maia could give her a big kiss on the cheek. "Mama love you? Does your Mama love you?" You started to tickle her.

"Oh, my little girl, Mama loves you so so much!" Emily babbled some nonsense to a tune to make Maia happy. "And who else loves you? Who else loves you, Mommy?"

"Uh-huh, Mommy! And Daddy!"

"Oh, Daddy loves you so much, of course he does!" Emily cooed. "Is Daddy gonna go take you to see your Grammy? Yeah?" Maia laughed bashfully. "Yeah, you're gonna go see your Grammy!" 

You didn't get out to Vegas much, but Spencer was heading out to see his mom, who hadn't met Maia. He felt guilty about it. She'd been sent a hundred pictures but Spencer had only been out there by chance, on cases, and spent a couple extra days there. Diana was elated that Maia's middle name was her name. 

Spencer was more capable than you gave him credit for. He knew everything to do with Maia, he was ready for this. And you and Emily trusted him completely. You guys both really needed a week just the two of you, even if you were still working. You drove Spencer and Maia to the airport, said your tearful goodbyes — it was your first time with Maia being away from you, not the other way around — and drove home.

When you got home, Emily kissed your forehead and said, "They're gonna be fine, baby,"

"I know," you sighed. "I'm just..."

"Scared. I know, love. I am too, but they're gonna be fine. And JJ and Henry are at the custody thing today and then she's taking him out to eat after, so we have the house to ourselves for a little while." You smiled.

"Horny," you laughed. Emily bit her lip and fought a smile. "Can't blame you, gorgeous." You tried not to show your apprehension. You didn't know how you'd react when she tried something. Everything was still so fresh. But you had no problem pleasuring her.

Your lips met hers and you put one hand on her neck, your thumb behind her ear, and your other on her hip. "I love you so much, Em,"

"God, I love you," she whispered. "Hey, we can go upstairs,"

"Okay," you murmured against her lips before pulling away. You stared at one another while she tried to see if something was wrong or not. At last she took your hand and pulled you up the stairs. 

She started to take off her shirt when the door was shut and you grinned at her body. But all that was running through your mind was about Will. "You're stunning, Ems," you said. 

"Not even close to how beautiful you are, darling," she smirked. "Love you,"

"Love you too." She came over to you and you stared at her bra. 

"You want it off?" Your mouth fell slightly open. Dumbstruck. Emily chuckled and stroked your cheek with her thumb, pressing herself up against you a little. "Hmm? How about this?" She tugged at your shirt and looked at you for consent. You were spaced out. 

Your cheeks were hot and she just reached under your shirt to rest her hand on your waist. Her light touch kept you from losing it, but you were still hurting. Her thumb stroked your ribs and Emily smiled, pity and love and sadness in her eyes. "That's just fine, baby. Give me one second, okay?" You nodded. Emily put her shirt back on, her reassuring expression remaining on her face at all times. When she came back over to you, she didn't touch you at all. "We're not gonna do anything you're not ready for, m'kay, love?" 

"I'm really sorry, I wanted to, I—"

"Hey." She stopped you, firm but loving. "Stop apologizing. It is not your fault. I am not upset. You've never once hurt me, and that's not changing. What do you need from me right now, baby? I just want to make sure you're alright." Your arms snaked around her waist and you put your head on her shoulder. Emily's tentative arms wrapped around you and she lazily rubbed your middle and lower back.

"I'm okay. I'm sorry,"

"Hey,"

"I—" You were about to apologize for apologizing. "I love you so much. I didn't mean to lead you on, I really did want to..."

"Shh, you didn't do anything wrong, my love. You're perfect. You're perfect. You didn't lead me on, baby. When you wanna stop, we stop, yeah? We always do." You worked to push the memories of Will out of your mind to enjoy this moment in Emily's embrace. 

"I love you, Emmy,"

"I love you too, Y/N. What do you wanna do? Are you hungry?" You shook your head, pulling off of Emily's chest. "No?"

"I need to take a shower." Emily smiled and nodded.

"Okay, sweet girl. I'll be downstairs, okay?" She went in to kiss you and you held up your hand.

"No, come with me." You met her in the middle of the kiss, as she'd stopped cold. Her smile returned and she kissed you. When you were done you added, "I—I don't want to do anything, though. Not to me. But I...I can make you feel good, Em." She raised her eyebrows and nodded slowly. You were scared she might think this was awkward, or she hated the idea, or she didn't want to. But she held your hands and smiled.

"Are you sure? I don't want you to do something you're uncomfortable with, especially because you think I want it, or you feel you owe me something—"

"Do you want to? We don't have to if you don't want,"

"I'm down, completely, but don't worry about me. Are you ready to do that, baby?"

"I—yeah,"

"All right. Then of course, yes, I'm one hundred percent willing. If you want to stop at any point, just tell me what you need me to do. Stop or slow down whenever you want to, baby. Yeah?"

You both stripped and got clothes to take in the shower.

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hey homies next chapter's gonna be the smut i swear