Sayans Academy: School for Magic

CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

CHAPTER 31: Ruyi Jingu Bang

Crizten's POV

BEFORE I totally transfer in this school, I was fine being with only myself. I was fine without having friends since my old ones left me. I was fine having only a pocketbook and silently read it on the Library or in a park nearby. Kung hindi iyon ang gagawin ko ay manunuod naman ako ng kdrama na nagiging dahilan upang ma-late ako sa klase dahilan para unti-unti na akong makilala nung guard.

I was fine being an introvert, because I keep on thinking that having friends is not as happy as what the others think. Sometimes, when you start on lowering your guard and starts on trusting someone, you can be a burden to that person.

And I was tired on being a burden.

I was tired that I keep on letting Ariella protect me while I do nothing to make myself strong. I was tired on trusting someone words like, 'I won't let them hurt you,' but still, they are the ones who broke those words.

I love reading novels that have action scenes on it because I imagine myself being like them, having the power to protect those whom I think need to be protected.

Ilang beses ko nang napanuod yung Chinese movie na IP Man kasi gusto kong matuto ng self-defense kahit nasa bahay lamang ako. Natuto naman ako, pero hindi ibig sabihin noon na malakas na ako.

Because if I want to be strong, then my heart should be as hard as stone. And having friends won't let me achieve my dream.

My dream which is standing on the front line, protecting the treasures that is mine.

But that kind of mindset was erased when I meet Chino Emegard and the others. I became strong because I have them, yes, but I became as weak as feather because of them, too.

Hindi ko sila sinisisi. More on, I'm blaming myself. They make me the head of this warforce because they saw a potential from me even though they are much more experienced than I am. I could finally stand on frontline and provide protection but all I could do was to support them from the back.

What kind of a leader watch his/her troops to get killed one by one because they want to save you? How could I call myself as their leader if I can't even ensure their safety in the battlefield?

Nung una, akala ko nasa amin ang pabor. Akala ko umaayon ang lahat sa plano, ngunit ang totoo ay umiikot kaming lahat sa palad ng Goddess. She used our own plan to get us. And hell, she succeed!

“I've heard of an explosion from there. What did happened?” Lahat kami ay nag-iwas ng tingin matapos marinig ang tanong na iyon ni Cassandra. Nakatagilid man ang ulo ko mula sa kanya ay nakita ko ang pagbaba ng tingin nito sa katawan ni Kuya.

Napatakip sa sariling bibig si Cassandra habang tinitingnang mabuti ang bangkay ni Kuya. Napansin ko ang panginginig ng tuhod nya saka napaluhod sa lupa habang lumuluha.

Everyone went silent again. Everyone was grieving.

Pinahis ko ang luhang pumatak saka huminga ng malalim. “I'm sorry. It… It was my fault,” basag ang boses kong saad. “If I was just stronger, I then perhaps could protect all of you. If I was stronger, we then, perhaps, doesn't have to borrow someone else power. If I was just…”

“Crizten, it was not your fault, okay?” kaagad na lumapit sa akin si Mrs. Buenaventura saka ako binigyan ng isang mahigpit na yakap.

Nagpatuloy naman ako sa pagsasalita. “If I was a good leader, then perhaps, no one does need to die. If I just become more rational.”