find me

10. the after party

A/N: Hey everyone! I'm excited to see a few new people are checking out the story and reading the chapters!

Thank you for reading, and welcome!!

This one is kind of emotional, a lot of arguing and some fluffy stuff at the end.
It's also a pivotal moment for Bucky and Natalie, it's what they call a point of no return.

I hope you enjoy! Let me know in the comments what you think!

ALSO, I have some exciting stuff for the next chapters so stay tuned ;)

Be safe! Lots of love,
Mary xx

~

The drive home was probably one of the most awkward moments Natalie ever had to endure.
Sam sat in the front with Steve, so Bucky and Natalie were forced to share the back seat.
Neither of them spoke one word on the whole way back, listening quietly to Sam's loud jokes and Steve's occasional laughs.

Bucky tried to focus on the view speeding up from his window, taking his mind off of all the destructive thoughts revolving around in his head.

All about how much he wanted to stamp Bruce's face into a wall.

Similarly to the brooding man sat next to her, Natalie compelled herself to focus on every object or car passing by on the street, in a desperate attempt to replace the overpowering images of that night popping up in her head.

Recalling all the embarrassment and shame with them.

Maybe it was the booze, maybe it was the anxiety that derived from it, maybe it was the constant reminder of her past trauma.

Maybe it was all of it at once.

But it was too much. She was overwhelmed and tired of dealing with all of these feelings.

Just having him next to her made her feel like she was about to break in a million pieces. Like broken glass, crashed to the ground at the first touch of his hand. She felt equally betrayed and guilty of betrayal. It felt like a heavy rock was sitting right at the top of her lungs, impeding her breathing, pressing her chest against her heart. She absolutely hated that feeling, made her sick to her stomach.

She could still taste the bitterness of the beer on her lips left by Bruce's tongue. The sensation sending shivers through her whole body, cringing at the memory.

Why did she even do that?

She couldn't remember thinking of a good reason in that very moment. To be honest she couldn't remember thinking at all, period. She just did it.
All she knew was that Bucky was standing right in front of her, kissing a random girl in a corner — after almost kissing her — and her first instinct was to get him out of her sight; that's when she saw a dangerously pissed Bruce walking up to her, getting closer and closer.

However, as hard as she tried to concentrate on the outside view, her mind kept going over their conversation on the roof. It's like her thoughts would unconsciously float back to what they told each other, every glance and every touch they shared.
The desperation and frustration in his voice, followed by dreadful flashing images of him kissing that girl in the dark, like sharp knives carving her brain.