find me

32. good night of sleep

October 6th - 7.30 am

Bucky woke up with the sunlight coming in from the window. His eyes fluttered open a few times, readjusting to the light. He yawned, then suddenly realised how relaxed his body was, how loose and comfortable every limb of his body was, almost numb but also his focus on every muscle sharper and stronger.

He was woken up by the sun.

He couldn't help the broad grin that spread over his face at the realisation he had woken up with the sun, meaning he had slept through most of the night.

He turned around and saw Natalie was still sound asleep behind him.

Something cracked in his chest, something good and powerful, rippling through his body.

Relief.

His limbs were heavy with sleep he hadn't had in months, but his heart was light. How could he ever thank her for such a gift? He had to find a way, to show her how grateful he was. Show her how much this meant to him.

She looked so content in her sleep, void of worries and fears. Her lips were slightly parted, small puffs of air came out in slow rhythmic cadence. He had the sudden urge to kiss her, probably still reeling off last night. He knew his brain had the whole day ahead to obsess over what had happened, to go over every detail, every touch, every word and possibly somehow twist it into something shameful, to turn it into guilt; and yet in that moment he couldn't help but feel good about all of it. For the first time in a long time, she had acted like she wanted him just as he was, not because she was hurt, or scared, or angry. Plainly and simply because she wanted him. His guts twisted and his heart jumped in his chest at the thought. He couldn't wrap his head around it.

But maybe he didn't have to. Maybe he could let her choose, let her take the next steps. That is if Bucky could actually resist his undeniable and quite evident need to be with her. He could feel the effects of that desire tingling down his body at the mere thought of what he'd do if they fucked.

The way she had grabbed his hand and brought it to her own lips, pure innocence and sinful malice exuding from her intoxicated gaze. Her eyes were glued to his when she took his fingers in her mouth and lapped over them with her tongue, as if she wanted him to see how much it affected her, how much pleasure and thrill she found in arousing him.

His mind looked messier than a good plate of scrambled eggs. The feeling of her mouth wrapped around him was otherworldly. She was so warm and soft. He knew exactly what he was imagining as she sucked and drew her lips tight around his fingers. And he could tell the exact same pictures were crossing her mind as his lustful desire and desperate need were reflected in her own eyes. Even when he pushed things a bit further, testing to what lengths she'd go and pressed on her tongue, deeper down towards her throat, she had slightly gagged and moaned for him.

Fuck, he thought he'd lost it then.

His blood had turned hot, every atom of his body focused on the feeling. It was so obscene, so lewd, but she had welcomed it, enjoyed it even. The only sign of some semblance of bashfulness was the timid blush that creeped over her cheeks, the otherwise tanned skin flustered in a pink hue. He had been close to her for long enough to know she definitely had a more covert and kinky side of her, but it was likely to come out and play only when summoned in the right context and given the right incentives and cues. Luckily for both of them, he knew exactly how to push those buttons in the right way. He could have her pliant, begging and soaked in moments. And in time he could teach her how to do the same with him.