77. rivers of water and salt

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I should have known, Hope thought to herself. Why did I think he would wait for me? Why did I think any of them would wait for me? Life moved on, none of them even remembered me. But no matter how reasonable the situation was, it still hurt. She didn't even want to admit it but it nearly hurt as much as it did to lose her parents.

Hope sat on her bed, staring at the ceiling. Everyone out there was busy trying to figure out how to track Josie and she was just...there. She wanted to go back into the place where time didn't tick, the place where light and life didn't shine.

All of her poisonous thoughts were washed away when she heard a set of footsteps walks past her room. As a tribrid, she could hear everything so she wasn't completely shocked to see Kaura backtrack to her doorframe. Kaura recognized the girl, from the beginning of the year, at the party. She was finally back.

"Who are you—" Kaura paused as the effect of her memory gain returned. And then it all made sense. It was Hope. The witch bolted for her, not caring if she looked desperate or vulnerable. None of them said another word, they just latched unto each other like it was the last thing they were going to do. To no surprise, they had both started to cry rivers of water and salt. Kaura suffered the most because she realized that the earthquake hadn't killed Mason or Penelope. It was her. She gripped onto Hope's back, not caring if she was crushing her and sobbed with more pain crashing into her. "IknewitIknewitIknewit." She knew that something was missing, knew that something was incomplete.

Hope caressed her hair considerately and nodded. "I've missed you so much."

Kaura pulled back and the first strokes of anger coiled her bones. "Why did you leave me?" Why did you leave me like my parents did?

"I—I had to save the world—"

"You didn't have to do shit. You didn't have to save the world, you chose to save the world. You chose to make me feel like I was crazy all those months because deep down, I knew something was missing. You chose to leave me."

Hope tried to wipe her tears but more came streaming down. "I know. I've come to realize that it was a bad move because I came back to find out the boy that I love loves someone else," she chuckled like it was funny. Kaura didn't say anything to that. Hope cleared her throat, shaking away all the negative feelings that were arising. "The Legendarium has Josie."

Kaura broke into a laugh. "Of course it does. The moment you're back, we're all back into mortal peril."

"Kaura—"

"No. I'm not getting involved in this anymore. The last time I did, two of the people I loved died. So why don't you do what you do best? Leave again, the Legendarium was fine before you came back," Kaura spat and stormed towards the exit. "So go save your fucking world." And then she slammed the door shut behind her.

*

Caroline made sure the door was locked and properly bolted to prevent anyone from coming in. After Hope returned, all of her erased memories had resurfaced. Including the ones about Clarke. 

The vampire approached a cabinet and quietly poured herself a generous amount of whiskey. She never saw why Damon enjoyed the drink, there were many other pleasurable beverages out there. But in a moment like this, she understood. She needed the burning and numbing substance to block out all the emotions that were pressing into her. 

As an adult, she knew what the feeling meant and she didn't put effort into ignore it. What she and Clarke had was so much more than a fling. It was the late-night dates, the movie nights and game nights. She disregarded the situation before because she was afraid that it would be one-sided but after what he once told her in the cell... I actually like you, I feel something towards you. It confused and pained her at the same time because they were on two ends of the line. 

Caroline sat down on a couch as she brought the glass to her lips. She took a sharp sip and stared off into nothing. He was probably in the darkness of the Legendarium, his cage. And after what he did, there was still a side of her that worried for him. Caroline scoffed to herself. She shook her head as tears prickled behind her eyelids. She hugged her knees to her chest and wept hard enough that her brain began to hurt. 

She crushed the glass of alcohol and screamed into the room. But before she knew it, Caroline forced herself to recollect herself. She wiped her tears and took a deep refreshing sigh. She cleared her throat and approached her desk to return to work like nothing had happened.

~

"You know... Hot... Angry...Damaged..."

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