Wisps: Recollection (Ninjago X Reader)

36. Blurry Faces

Something smooth brushed under your eyes, and you snapped them open. Fuzziness. And with a smudge, you wiped at your wet eyes. You don't remember what caused the tears, in an attempt to repress those feelings with them in your room. "What is it?"

"It was just a nightmare."

"About?" Pixel pried, and you hunched over, messaging your temples. "Is it recurring?" She got that much unknowingly right.

"First one." You lied.

"Is that so?" You waved Pixel off, slipping out of the sheets. "...We have to go soon, we were invited to an interview again with the rest. There's no training for you today."

That... was the best thing you've heard all week. You'll have the whole day to yourself. Right?

"I've told Wu what happened-" Zane burst your tiny bubble.

"You what!?" Of course, why would anything turn out for the better?

"He'll arrive at- actually, he's most likely already here." Zane raised a panel on his forearm, and your eyes wandered to the clock hanging by the door. Eight in the morning. Yesterday night was as close as you were getting in terms of sleep. "Aren't you sleepy?" Ignoring him, you yawned, your breath stank of alcohol and a tinge of smoke. You rummaged through your pockets, and your fingertips met the dip of it. 

'Did I lose it drinking? Was it Ronin-?'

"I have your wallet." Zane clasped it in his digits and didn't make a move to hand it back to you.

"You going to hand it over or?"

"You're not going out to drink." Zane sighed, stashing the wallet in his pocket. A tinge of annoyance caused your headache to sharpen. Did Tincan here think he could start pushing you around?

"You don't trust me enough to keep it together?" Trust. 'You couldn't have used another word?'

"If your first response to stress is to sneak out at midnight, past curfew, to a bar, and almost be caught doing so, then by that definition, no, I do not trust you to "keep it together"."

"I agree fully with Zane."

"Hah, of course." You go outside of your room and slam the door on them. That trust between you and Pixel has long rusted away. You're not surprised. So you keep closing her off, unlike how you used to try and impart things when you knew she had your side.

"Wait!" The door unhinges open, the footfalls catching up to you. You were thinking of going to the bathroom to lose them. You did just that, locking the door on Zane's nervous face. You might as well brush your teeth while you're at it.

"You misunderstood-"

"I understood all there is." You kept your voice low, your headache begging for it to stay that way. You don't pay attention to how you applied the toothpaste and start brushing as they rant like dumbasses.

"What Pixal meant is you need to find other ways to sort through your problems."

"You made it worse, now they're not answering." You spat out the toothpaste, a sliver of a smile on your mouth, it's gone from the mirror in a blink. A tired glare returned to spear you under it. You wished you had never gone into that cave.

'You wish for a lot of things to never happen...' The first was to never come here. You invaded a world that would never want you. And, that's all you'll ever know... There were so many that you got attached to and it became a fleeting dream of them being there. The bonds you worked to wisp into their threads severed, in the most abrupt way. You're lucky if you're forgotten and left alone, instead of berated, cursed out, or chased off. Why are they coaxing you so hard after all this? After you gave them the cold shoulder so many times? Would they break these walls only for you to rebuild them again?