Wisps: Recollection (Ninjago X Reader)

46. The Last Resort

Content Warning: Violence

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Waking up was a chore, one you angrily trodded through with the sound of scraping on metal. You smelled burnt food. You rubbed out the eye gunk with a yawn, squinting your beady eyes at the first rays of the sun. "Really Jay?"

"Sorry. Go back to bed."

"You're burning the food, how can I?" You grumbled back, stretching off the couch and feeling your neck ache with the imprint of how you slept on it. "What are you doing?"

"Making Nya breakfast."

"Or burning it."

"Are you gonna help me or just roast me and the fish?"

"Hm, how about I help you and roast you." You looked at the pan, the almost charcoal pieces peeling off with each harsh scrape. "How did that even happen?"

"Please, don't even get me started." He plopped the pan into the sink to soak.

"You got the fish and kelp?" You think you'll skip breakfast like always with Ronin. Salty things in the morning didn't do it for you.

"Yep." You saw as he said that, the kelp and the fish prepared, filleted. "Echo Zane sliced it and kinda wandered off." You hummed an amused note at that and went to the cutting board next to the long turned-off stove. You thought it would stay that way as you reached up for a pan. The roar is instant, reviving the memory that could have branded your arm. You dropped something with a thunderous clang and sprang from the fire as sizzling air breathed over your hand. Your pants ran dry, like the scorching heat of the flames.

"Don't... don't do that again."

"Wha...?" He was utterly confused.

"I said. Don't. Do that. Again." Each word you enunciated with venom, piercing his still form.

"It's just a flame." He had the audacity to say that.

"It's just a flame." Your grimace shifted into a scowl. Repeating that phrase frustrated you all the more. Belittling wasn't as reassuring as it once was. "That's all you see Kai as. An innocent flame." You want to laugh, hide the fear as what you say quivered, "He almost killed me." Your breaths are snatched up in your lungs, tight while you unravel: "None of you see that. When all you did was stare. All of you on that balcony." You struck hard there. He can't say anything to that. He couldn't. "And when I save myself... you don't see a victim..."

Tears stung you. The fire was gone with the smoke. Everything was still. Nothing was wrong. It was just a flame. Nothing more. Nothing less.

He didn't look at you. Jay swallowed and turned off the burner, "...I'm sorry." He said. You blinked rapidly, both to clear the tears and to get a better grasp. You must have heard wrong. But he said it one more time. "I'm sorry. I won't do that again. I promise." Remorse clearly carved into his features, through his voice as you looked away. "I never looked at it from your side... and I'm sorry for that."

Pity coated those words. What good is pity when everything is said and done? When it's all said and done, why do you want to keep listening to him? He spoke again.

"I–I was just blaming you without even thinking. Blaming you for how Kai died–for everything–"

"It wasn't your fault..." This brief understanding. It wouldn't make way for the rapid, drowning floods from the rain. Understanding each other wasn't so simple. It never was. Never.

"Nya? When did you..." The usual, half-hearted glare she would put on was blank from her face, avoiding you. There was something she wanted to say. You didn't wait for it, slipping past her.