miyamura x reader || deja vu

chapter fourteen. deja vu

"you know, miyamura-kun, our fake relationship?" you said. he turned his attention toward you. "it all feels like an ingenuine deja vu."

he smiled cluelessly. "hm?"

you deadpanned, placing your hands on your kitchen table to lean closer to him. did he not understand? embarrassing. "i mean, erm," how could you seriously explain how you felt about the start of all this if he had no clue about what you were talking about?

you pressed your lips together and avoided his curious gaze before he let out a small laugh. your boyfriend smiled lightheartedly and patted your head. you were glad you got to know this side of him, despite the circumstances.

"i think i get what you mean," izumi continued, tracing the frame of his old glasses. you crawled closer to him and he playfully took you into his arms. "but i can tell the difference between what's real and what's fake, especially with our feelings."

"i guess you're right. you talk a lot more now. like, deeply."

"you kind of had that effect on me.."

"how's that?"

miyamura scratched the back of his neck. "that one day."

. . .

"we can start over."

you sniffled and looked up at him curiously, parting the comforting embrace in curiosity. the coolness of the surrounding air struck you like a bolt of lightning, and you suddenly yearned for the same warmth to envelop you again. "start.. over..?"

"..um," he froze, turning a bit red. he glanced away from you. he's blushing! then he smiled lightly.

it was silent. the quiet chirping of the birds around you were one of the few things keeping you clinging to reality. he slid his hands down to yours, and a line of heat spread to the sides of your body. he slowly leaned closer to you, bringing his lips to your forehead. you felt his light exhale tickle your scalp, his dark hair blocking your vision. his soft jacked smelled lightly of vanilla pastries. you were relieved. "we'll be okay."

you stayed like this, eventually moving your head away from his shoulder to look at his expression. his smile was genuine and his eyes were on yours.

"miyamura-kun," you caught his attention, fully understanding how he felt. you smiled, warmth spreading throughout your body. you weren't sad. you weren't scared. "you can say it, you know."

"you don't need to be embarrassed. sometimes saying.. more feels like you're saying less, as long as it means more to you."

"well," he paused, unsure how to continue. "i think.."

he didn't know what to say. he'd rather show you.

"it'll take practice. but you should know that you can freely express how you feel around me, okay?"

"okay."

as if moving on its own, your feet arched and you stood on your toes, leaning closer. you two fit together, and nothing could break you apart. you only lasted a millisecond of a peck on the lips before feeling like your head would overheat.

"this time, we'll take the right steps."

. . .

a part of you still wanted to believe that love was a fickle thing. perhaps this was only a result of denial. either way, the facade of such was what had drawn you to your miyamura-kun in the first place.

it's a special type of deja vu, you thought, feeling as if the warmth of his hand on yours provided enough for the whole season. it's the type i wouldn't mind reliving.

at least, this warmth was genuine. and, although it reminded you greatly of a time in which it was anything but real. you were able to decipher.

because, this time, it was a feeling you knew wouldn't end.

it was the best kind of nostalgia,

your first relationship turned into your second. all that remained was a pleasant, welcoming...

deja vu.