its not about us anymore. and its never gonna be ME no more.
i saw you, you saw me. but you didn't say 'hi' coz i looked away. HAHA bull! this is like a lyric from a song. but you know what's more bull than that? seeing you with somebody else, happy. while i'm here, dying. still dying coz of hope that everything's gonna be okay again. that everything will be back to normal. that everything will be back from where it belonged. but no. HAHA i'm fooling myself again.
this is just a one way love. from the very beginning, it was all in my head. it was always me who loves you the most. more than a friend, bestfriend, brother, father. but you just see me as your bestfriend, your sister. you were my happiness and my loneliness. you taught me alot of things that i needed to learn. you also taught me what love really is. but everything now is just a memory.
if i could stop loving you, i hope it wont be soon. this may sound pathetic but i still believe that you'll wake up one day regretting all the things you did. regretting most of the decisions you made which includes ignoring me. and maybe one day, you'll come to my door asking for one more chance. to fix things and make it all better. coz you know, it's only you who could make me happy again.
if only i can forget you, i will never do that though. you were everything to me. every happiness i felt is because of you. you took every loneliness in me. i wish you'll do the same thing till now. but i'm fooling my self again.
it's not gonna happen anytime soon. it will never gonna happen. it wont.
you found your lovelife now. you found your happiness. and i guess i should be happy for you even if i'm still bitter about everything. and even if i still want you back. even just our friendship back.
i wish i could thank you for all that, atleast. i wish i will have guts to come up to you, without my tears falling from my eyes.
i hope i can. but i just can't.
today, i'm wearing my favorite shirt. this is your first gift to me. and i really liked it. you know what i want. but do you know what i want the most? your presence here with me. but i need to move on right? but how? tell me how Frank. teach me how. just like when you taught me how to love you. teach me how to forget you frank. without me or you hurting. but i don't want it to include distance. not now. not ever.
as i'm staring through you from here, where i'm sitting, right now, you, in your blue plaid shirt and black skinny jeans, is walking towards this direction, with the new girl, in her cute floral dress, wrapping her arms in yours, to greet me with, "hey sam! i would like you to meet jessa"?
why on earth would you do that?
"hey albert! this is jessa!" he told albert. my suitor. albert is one typical guy. he's tall, fit, physique. he has an eye of a charming guy, a body of a hot man, and a smile that kills most of the girls heart.
yes. i allowed him to court me. i saw something in him. he's half-filipino and half-white, just like me. but he doesn't know how to speak filipino. like me, he's raised here in states.
as what i've told you before, time passed by so fast. frank just started talking to me when albert start courting me. what a cliche life story eh? so complicated.
"hey albert! don't you ever hurt samara okay? she's one of a kind. she's precious." frank start talking again. they laughed and giggled. he was talking random things with albert but i couldn't hear a word of. i can only hear his voice... not the words he's saying.
believe it or not, i always miss his voice. and he stills make me fall even now. maybe? or is it just me who thinks of it alot. but whatever it is, i know he still has a place in my heart. and noone can ever replace him here.
BINABASA MO ANG
My Idiot Bff
FanfictionSam and Frank were best friends since high school. They were like siblings. One day, one of them ate the forbidden apple and became smart. Smart enough to feel more than just friend for the other. But too coward to let that feeling prevail. Will tha...
