Mending Old Wounds

Oblivious

Friday Morning June 25th

Midoriya's POV:

"You are completely oblivious, aren't you? You really have no idea..."

"Oblivious about what, Deku? You're not making any sense. I have no idea where this is coming from, so just fucking tell me what's wrong already."

He leaned forward, grabbed my left hand with his right, and put his right hand on my shoulder. Those little gestures, those friendly touches, that's all they were to him. He was just trying to figure out what was wrong with his friend, but his touch sent shock waves through my body. I knew he was looking at my face, willing my eyes to look into his, but I couldn't remove my attention from his hand in mine. So rough, so calloused, so perfectly imperfect. I pulled my hand from his and stood up from the couch, taking a step back. Trying to ground myself, I started looking around the familiar living area. Memories flooded my mind, I have so many memories of being in this house. That train of thought came to a screeching halt, when I noticed a very familiar Crimson Riot hoodie draped over a chair in the corner.

"Kirishima...he- he spent the night," I asked hesitantly, looking back at him. He had followed my gaze over to the armchair, and was turning back towards me. He folded his arms over his chest, and leaned back against the arm of the couch."Tch. Yeah."

My eyes widened as I realized he was avoiding my eyes now. Is Kacchan blushing? I bit my lip so I wouldn't let out any involuntary sounds, before he continued.

"Ei's still in the bed, he'd sleep till noon if I let him," he said with a small chuckle. I looked away again before he could look back at me.

Ei?! He calls him Ei now? When did that happen? He's BLUSHING. THE Katsuki Bakugou is blushing. No, no, no, no. This explains so much.

Don't cry.

Not this time.

Hold it together Izuku.

This changes everything.

"Izuku! Are you listening? I said your name three times. Are you going to tell me what the fuck is wrong with you," Kacchan asked, now standing in front of me. His tone was uncharacteristically soft, laced with concern even. I almost looked at him, but I couldn't keep torturing myself. I couldn't look into those gorgeous ruby eyes.

"S-Sorry, for bothering you so early, it-it's not really important," I wanted to say more, but my voice was trying to crack. I turned away and headed for the door, I heard him move towards me, but I just said, "I'll catch you later, okay, Bakugou?"

The name must have shocked him because he stopped dead in his tracks and that gave me the opportunity to slip out the door and down the front walk. When I hit the sidewalk, I activated One For All and ran from the house as quickly as I could. I thought I heard a faint "DEKU!" But my mind was probably just playing tricks on me. I continued to blindly run through the city. Avoiding people. Trying to put distance between us. Trying to outrun my feelings. I deactivated OFA and found myself near the old park where Ka- Bakugou and I used to play, when we were kids.

Nope. No. Not going to do this.

I didn't activate OFA, but I did run from there, as fast as I could, towards my apartment, only to remember that Mom was away on vacation with Mitsuki and Masaru for the weekend, and I left my house keys back in my dorm.

Shit.

I harshly rubbed my hands over my face a few times, then through my hair, pulling at it for a minute before I started running again, towards UA this time. I really didn't want to go back there. Uraraka knew my plan for the day, she would definitely ask me what happened and I definitely didn't want to talk about it yet. So I took my time. I ran all the way there, instead of taking the train, and I took a few long detours along the way. I tried not to think too much, just focused on my breathing and the sound of my shoes hitting the sidewalk. Pretty soon, I was able to focus on my sore muscles, too. I was pushing too hard, had run for too long, and I knew it, I just didn't care. It had begun to rain at some point, and I didn't even really notice, I just kept pushing my body until I finally found myself inside the gates of UA. I made my way to a secluded bench I knew of, under some Sakura trees on the far side of the grounds, away from the dorms. I pulled out my phone to check the time. I noticed some missed calls and texts, but I ignored them and turned my phone off.

1:45pm. Damn. I left here around 6:15. So I was probably running around for around five hours. No wonder my body is screaming at me. I'm soaked, too. I could probably slip into the dorm unnoticed sense it's Saturday, but I don't know if I can take another step. Jeez, Kacchan would really kick my ass for this.

With that one thought, I couldn't hold it back anymore. I broke. The tears began to pour down my face as I laid down on my side on the bench, pulling my knees to my chest. I wanted to scream. I wanted to scream until I lost my voice, but that would've frightened and alerted anyone in hearing distance. So, I just laid there. Violent sobs erupted from my mouth, and shook my whole body. It hurt physically, but it was nothing compared to the overwhelming emotional pain. I felt nothing except that pain. I had every part of me convinced that he might actually love me like I loved him. Truth was, I wanted it so bad, I was seeing something that wasn't there. He would only ever see me as a friend. Like a brother. So, I laid there, succumbing to a knowledge that should have been more than evident to me in all the years we've spent together. We have known each other our entire lives, so I should have known, he would never love me back. Not the way I want. I gradually lost consciousness. My last thought before the darkness enveloped me:

How the hell am I going to face him now?