John: what type of person are you?
Sherlock: the type that randomly wants to be left alone even though nothing is wrong
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Lestrade: Sherlock...why do you look like you haven't slept for weeks?
Sherlock: I just spent 6 hours explaining the laws of thermodynamics to a 10 year old because they asked me "why does ice melt?"
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Euros: *walks into a crime scene* ah so it's gonna be one of those nights huh? So we burning or burying?
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John: I am John! I was an army doctor! I caught in a war! I befriended the unbefriendable! I-
Sherlock: is your head stuck in a vending machine?
John: I payed for my crisps so I am getting my crisps.
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Mycroft: where's Sherlock?
John: doing stuff.
Mycroft: I don't like the sound of that. Where's Molly?
John: trying to stop Sherlock from doing the stuff.
Mycroft: and Mary?
John: trying to stop Molly from stopping Sherlock doing the stuff.
Mycroft: and what are you meant to be doing John?
John: I'm supposed to stop you from stopping Mary from stopping Molly from stopping Sherlock from doing the stuff.
Lestrade: *distant screaming* WHAT THE FU-
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Moriarty: *points gun at Lestrade, Sherlock and John* give me your money if you want to live.
John: bold of you to assume I have money.
Sherlock: bold of you to assume I want to live.
Lestrade: NOW IS NOT THE TIME FOR YOUR BULLSHIT
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YOU ARE READING
Johnlock OneShots!
FanfictionHere! *throws* take the fluff! Oh uhhhh and the angst- and the Johnlock- (ARTWORK NOT MINE!)
