Incoherent Thoughts Organized Into Neat Paragraphs

slipping

I can feel it all going past me,

as if I stand in the river styx and they flow inbetween my toes.

The smell of his tshirt

the easy silence between me and my best friend

the fire that took too long to start

her head on my shoulder

falling asleep in backyards under the stars

kissing him

all this happening at one time

by the time I catch one glittering moment it is running through my fingers and down my arms.

I swallow so much water I make myself sick

when we fought

when I pretended I wasnt crying

When you picked me up from the hospital

when I didnt pick up the phone

when we talked all night

I don't want to forget any of it

Even when I'm choking on my own bitter memories.

I wanna remember all of it

All of it.