For When The Pants Dont Fit

40 4 3

by impasta18

by impasta18

All this confidence can be brought to its knees
by a too-small pair of jeans

My bedroom mirror
is like a best friend.
She always tells me I look so good that none could contend.
Witness to every lone underwear dance,
She points to all my flaws and she chants
Yaaass queen
Yaaass
Yaaaas

A glance back to her as I'm leaving
And I leave smiling.

The dressing room mirror
is my inner critic incarnate.

She is Regina George with my face.
She offers no embrace

She points at my flaws with
her cold hearted touch
She chants
Too much
Too much
Too much.

I forget my bedroom mirror
when I am here
Begging a pair of size twelves to pull past my hips
But it just won't fit.

Pleading the dressing room mirror
To be gentle
But she confirms all my fears

And the dressing room becomes a funeral
I shed tears for the body I wish was beautiful.
For all the pants and dresses that did not zip
For the life I could have if I was just a little more fit.

But,
Then I remember my bedroom mirror
And I leave the store
Leave the pants here.

Before long I am laughing at the me who cried the river
before I built the bridge
and crossed it to meet the me
I had always wanted to be.

And she looked just the same.
Only she glowed with all the love
I'd only hoped to claim.

Now, I carry my bedroom mirror
with me everywhere I go
And when I see another girl turning
A dressing room into a funeral home
I reflect all of that love I wished for before

And I tell her to leave this store.
Don't go listening to
That dressing room mirror
I dry her tears.
I tell her that

I love myself now to finally get
That sometimes
the damn pants just don't fit.