Marvel/Actor Stories

Secret Past Pt. 1. (B.B.)

You are on the Avengers team with everyone, including one James Barnes. You two don't exactly get along, but do get to know each other's secrets.

Warnings: Language, parental abuse, fighting

This is written from the point of view of you. There will be a second part that has more drama, and smut.

Bucky and I have tension between us. We don't care for one another, at all. I hated that Steve was so willing to die to save one person, let alone someone who doesn't even think he's worth anything. He hates me right back, though I never cared to know the reason.

We got paired together, unfortunately, for a mission. I glared over at him on the jet. He smirked, "You are far too small and adorable to be intimidating to me. Just say whatever you want to say." I rolled my eyes, "Just stick to the plan, and don't get any stupid ideas. You have a rep for going off plan on missions. This one is going to take a few days, so I'd appreciate you not screwing this all up."

He laughed; his genuine smile and laugh are actually kind of cute. "I only improvise when needed, Y/n. So relax. If I go off the damn plan it would be to keep us safe." "I don't need you trying to keep me safe. I've been keeping myself safe from shit since I was four years old." I let it slip slightly, then was thankful we were at our drop zone.

When we landed I was quickly checking in with HQ to inform them. Then we silently made our way to the apartment where we would be set up for the next few days. We will be here while we stake out the place and try to infiltrate the organization to get information. He was hovering as I set up the computer for the camera feeds.

I sighed, "What is on your mind, Barnes?" He pouted his lips as I glanced at him. "What did you mean before? You said you've been protecting yourself since you were four. What on Earth does a four year old need to protect themselves from?" He asked, genuinely confused and concerned. "An angry, drunken father." I stated sharply, then walked out carrying the camera I would plant in the bar.

After subtly getting the spy cam in place at the bar, I had a couple shots. I hadn't meant to tell him anything about my life. Yet here I am letting my worst memories slip right off my tongue. He is a little too easy to talk to for somebody I hate. Now he's going to pity me. And I hate that. It's why I don't tell people about my childhood.

When I got back he was watching the camera, as well as another that someone had planted for us before the mission began. He glanced my way, and seemed to want to say something but he knew it might set me off. He sighed, "Let me just say... for whatever it's worth... I'm sorry. That is no way to have to learn to protect yourself." I shrugged, "Thanks, I appreciate that. Can we just drop it?" He nodded, looking understanding. "Absolutely."

The next night we sat in a car watching an exchange go down. He let out a slow deep breath, "Since I know something about you now... I'll tell you something people don't know about me. I remember the feeling of getting my mind wiped, and all the conditioning Hydra did to me."

I nodded slowly. He wasn't looking at me as he spoke casually. "I'm sorry. That has to be awful." He nodded, "I deal with it the best I can." "Does Steve know?" I blurted the question, immediately feeling bad for invading his personal matters. I went to retract my question but he looked at me and shook his head, "It's fine, Y/n. No. He doesn't know. He deals with enough because of me, you know? So I just keep it all in a box in my head."

I half smiled at him. "We truly are equal now. Because nobody else knows about my dad." He returned my smile with a partial one of his own, "Perfect person to know. The one who doesn't care otherwise." I laughed softly, looking at the building. "Agreed."

Two days later we had gotten what we needed to move forward, and we were given backup. As we charged the building I was cornered by three huge guys. I fought my hardest, but was easily overpowered.