Nudes

0.9

3 DAYS UNTIL THE SUICIDE

Calum's P.O.V.

I promised Evelyn that I wouldn't miss school again and I wouldn't go anywhere. I plan to keep my promise. The last thing I want to do is let her down.

I don't know, I think i actually might be...falling for her. She's caring, beautiful...broken. I just want to fix whatever is holding her back from being happy. I've never liked a girl before. It was always a fuck and run. 

Now I'm leaning up against my locker, just thinking about my dumb high school crush that will probably go away in a week or so.

"Hey, fuckboy." I turn my head to see Evelyn a bright smile. Just the simple glance of her smile made me do the same. I've never seen her smile like that.

"Hey, fuckgirl." 

"That's definitely not a thing so technically I won."

We both start walking to the back of the school where the football field is at. People usually go there when they want to be alone and i'm getting the vibe that she wants to be alone. We find a random place on the sidelines and sit down.

"So, about yesterday-" I start to say but she cuts me off.

"it's fine we don't have to talk about it."  

I thought girls like talking about their feelings and shit like that.

"I will keep my promise. I don't know how I got on the bathroom floor but I do know why I was upset." I was trying to avoid eye contact because, honestly, I'm scared to open up to her.

"Would you like to talk about it?"

"I never wanted to hurt you. I was stupid for making you do that and I'm sorry. I ruined your life and I can't even look at myself in the mirror without thinking about what I did. I know you forgive me and that we should move on but I don't know, I just can't forgive myself."

"Why does it matter to you so much? I've already forgiven you so many times. We're friends. We're right here, right now. So why does it matter?" I'm not looking at her directly but I can see her shrug on the corner of my eye.

I can't tell her.

"It's complicated." 

"You can tell me anything." She lifted my chin and made me make eye contact.

I gulped and snapped my head away. "I just can't tell you right now, okay? It's none of your business, anyway." I grabbed my bag and left her alone in the empty bleachers.

I hear her call my name as I'm leaving the stadium but I don't turn around.

Who does she think she is? If I said I don't want to fucking talk about it then I don't. Why is she so fucking pushy?

Maybe I shouldn't have snapped at her but she also should've just left it alone.

I don't want to tell her that I'm falling in love with her. That's how friendships get ruined. I don't want anything to change because this may be as far as I'm going to get with Evelyn.

I don't want to take that chance.

Evelyn's P.O.V. 

I don't know how I felt after lunch today. 

I don't know what I did to make him snap. He's the one that said he wanted to fucking talk about it.

How can he cry into my arms one second then snap on me the next? I don't have the energy to sit here and try to figure this boy out.

Like what the fuck does he want from me?

If I knew being friends with Calum Hood was gonna be this much work, then I wouldn't have even bothered.