Peter parker & Avengers// One shots

i don't know

TW//   Panic attack, implied sexual assault, (bucky's triggers and commands from Hydra), dissociation, mentions of a bad therapist (please don't let this make you scared of therapy if you need it, it is truely a wonderful thing/ with the right therapist ofc/)

—-i had a sudden urge to write so here's this—-
//inspired by a work on Ao3 that i can not remember the name of//

'That sucked' Bucky grumbled.

He was walking with sam back to 'their', it was buckys but sam spent just as much time, if not more, there as bucky did. apartment from the god awful room with its god awful chairs that weren't even that comfortable where he had to talk to that god awful woman again.

She had called and insisted on him bringing sam to his next appointment, which meant he had to try extra hard not to say what he felt. He thought for a second she might go easy but that thought was futile, she just had to pull out the red notebook she absolutely had to write in. the one that reminds him of his days in Hydra, of the words and everything that came after them. Bucky swears he's never seen her read anything from it, only write.

Anyway, here he is, silently walking next to sam who keeps rambling on about something bucky doesn't understand.

'you agree right, i was in the right there?' Sam asked.

bucky blinked owlishly and nodded his head. 'yep mhm, you're always right wilson'

'you weren't listening were you? eh it's fine, at least you don't interrupt like my sister does' he chuckled, 'i can hardly get a word out before she's moving along with her own story'

bucky chuckled lightly.
it was forced.
sam noticed.
because of course he noticed, 'are you alright man?'

'yeah i'm just tired, i think' he yawned to accentuate the point.

'that's understandable, let's order in tonight, i don't think either of us want to cook' he turned and waited in front of the door for bucky to open it.

since when had they gotten to his apartment? he was losing time again, the last time it happened he had been sat on a park bench for three days before sam came to get him.

'you gonna let me in?' sam pushed, but not in a rude way. there was a hint of laughter beneath his words.

'yeah, yeah. you're so impatient wilson'

' come on man, i've told you a million times call me sam, you make me sound like my dad'

' fine sam' bucky sighed, usually he wouldn't give up as easily and would end up winning the argument but he was too exhausted to even think about verbal sparring with him.

'hey, let me do it' sams voice came out softer than a moment ago, and it took bucky a moment to realize he was offering to unlock his door. buckys hands seemed to be shaking too much for him to open it. he looked away and handed sam the keys.
' after you' sam motioned, 'it's your apartment'

'thanks' Bucky said, ducking underneath sams arm as he entered his apartment.

'so i was thinking we could order pizza? if you were down for that, and maybe watch a movie' sam spoke up from his bedroom where he was changing.

'y-' he cleared his throat, 'yeah sounds good' he retreated into his bedroom and got changed into something more comfortable than what he had on.

when he left his room he saw sam on the couch.

'heyy, i ordered our favorites and it's going to take about forty minutes, as for what movie-' bucky zoned out as he moved towards the kitchen to grab a drink. 'bucky? ' when had sam stopped talking?