i want to hate you, something i could never do, and the more that i try, i think that i just hate me instead. i know what they say, i don't deserve this, i was just a kid, when i was roped into your plans. i always wanted to be like you, how you smiled like it was cool, when your heart was peeling, like the bitter oranges we ate that june.
when everything that was left disappeared, your soul remained bare, and your face turned cold, for every part of you that you liked was gone, and even the parts that you didn't like, too. you never knew how much you missed them until you no longer had them.
what you did to me isn't who you were to me, i hope that you know that. i know that i should hate you, God knows that i wanted to, but when you finally left, i just felt dead. i love you more than i hate myself, so for you, i wish the best. i swear that you always deserved it.
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a/n: if anyone relates to this poem and is in a dangerous situation, please stay safe. i have found that there are plenty of resources on 4help.org. although the main concept of the poem is that this person wasn't what they did to me, it doesn't justify their actions. just because i was able to forgive this person doesn't mean that you should forgive the person in your own circumstance. so don't feel as if you are obliged to!
