everlasting

seven years

you've been acting strange
ever since that day,
i snuck outside of my house,
just to be the first to tell you happy birthday. 
i was invited to your party,
but i didn't know anyone,
but they all knew me,
and you were the one. 

i talked to you all night.
chocolate cake
cars 2 theme
pepperoni pizza,
because you didn't like the cheese. 
and when i was about to leave,
you leaned in and hugged me. 
and that was your seventh birthday.

i missed you on the days when 
you were out with your sisters, 
and on the days you would play with 
our front door neighbor,
it seems like just yesterday 
we were exchanging words, 
while peaking through holes,
in that old wooden fence we shared. 
licking popsicles 
and stealing oreos-
i remembered seeing the sign on your lawn. 
and i asked my dad about it.
 that was the day you moved. 

i miss you too much to ever let you know,
and it's been years, but this room still feels cold.
and honey, i long for your gaze, for evermore. 
darling, i hate you so much, you'd never know,
because when you left, all i had was our gold,
and it's been so long that i almost forget-
it's been about seven years since you've left. 

we've got new neighbors now.
we always pronounce their names wrong,
they have british accents,
and your garage is always clean and filled with biking gear.
i remember climbing onto your parents' bouncy bed,
it was so tall-
or we were too short,
i can't recall.
we jumped on your parents' fancy bed,
we probably wrecked it all,
all the sheets came undone,
but you thought that it was all fun,
what's your sister, delilah, doing these days? 
she must be graduating college now. 

i've forgotten you for too long-
you only come back in old dreams
and interims of different realities
that i can't explain. 
you were my first best friend. 
it's been almost seven years-
but i promise i still know that.