Banter || Hemmings

San Ju Ichi

After I sat down in the computer chair I pulled my socks up. We’d been moved into the computer lab today because we had a substitute and there was no work left for us. So her idea of a lesson was to do anything we wanted as long as it was appropriate. I was ok with this. It mean I could look over our school’s social networking site. It was kind of like Facebook but after you graduated your page got deleted and you could have it taken from you before then. As I logged on I could hear a few snickers and laughs from behind me.

I turned around and saw all the girls I despise giggling amongst themselves. I rolled my eyes at them before turning back to my computer. I typed in my password before clicking enter. I scrolled down and read through some of the comments on my page. That when I saw it. There were screen shots of the video Dan posted everywhere along with comments. “Slut, Wtf? Hahahahaha, she’s obviously pregnant now”.I breathed in heavily as tears came to my eyes. Suddenly laughter erupted from behind me. I sobbed quietly before getting up and running out of the room, the sub calling out after me.

When I ran out I saw pictures plastered everywhere. I stopped breathing for a second. I suddenly ran over and started ripping as many of them down as I could. I ran to my locker and unlocked it before grabbing out my bag. Just as I was about to run out of the school a bunch of people stood in the hallway. Every single one of them had their phones out and were filming me. I opened my mouth to say something but just ran past instead. I ran as fast as I could all the way home. When I got there my lungs burnt but I didn’t care. Mum’s car wasn’t in the driveway so I grabbed the key from on top of the doorframe and unlocked both doors. I threw the key onto the bench and raced up the stairs.

I threw my bag against the wall and held onto my bedpost. I took a shaky breath and leant against the railing. A heavy sob left my mouth. I swayed forward and back against the post as I tried to calm my breathing. I let go of the cold frame and walked over to my desk. I pulled a few of my ornaments off, hearing them smash when they collided with the wooden floor. I stood up straight and took a deep breath in. I wiped under my eyes and grabbed my laptop. I opened it up and logged in, the page immediately popping up. I clicked on the status box and started typing.

I know what you think me now. So thanks…now I can see how nasty the world can be. I’m none of the things you say I am so you can keep them to yourself from now on because I won’t be around to hear them. Don’t bother saying you were my friend because I’ll know you’re lying.

I let my mouse hover over the post button before deciding to click it. I stared at it for a while before slamming the lid to my laptop shut. My phone started to ring from my bag so I walked over and picked it up.

“What the hell are you doing?” Daisy shouted from the other end of the phone.

“Crying,” I answered.

“Please tell me you’re not planning on killing yourself,” she demanded.

“It’s crossed my mind,” I admitted.

“Ashlynn I swear to god…”

“I don’t want to talk to you,” I said then hung up and dropped my phone.

I walked to the bathroom and started the bath. I ran my hand under the water as I sat on the edge of the bathtub. I decided to pull out my container of anti-depressants and take one before screwing the lid back on and setting them on the counter. Once it was full enough I turned off the taps and let my hand play with it for a while. I looked at the container for a while before hearing my name being called.

“Ashlynn what are you doing?” Daisy shouted from the bathroom door.

“I was going to have a bath. Calm the fuck down,” I said spitefully.