Finding You

Chapter 1

September 2018

The only positive thing that has come out of going to a frat party for myself is that the music blares so loudly that I can't hear my own thoughts. As the stack of empty red solo cups in my hand gets higher, the easier it is to escape my mind a little. That and with each cup it gets a little less nauseating drinking this cheap beer. God knows that time it is. With one arm raised holding my stack of plastic red cups, the loose strap on my plum colored tank top slides off my other shoulder slightly as my hips stay swaying side to side. I close my eyes and tilt my head back a little, feeling my dirty blonde hair swishing across my back, with one arm still raised over my head while the loud music fills my ears and seeps into my brain pushing out everything else. Even with my eyes closed I still sense the flashing lights filling the room with colorful movement.

All of a sudden bodies are pushed into mine and I feel warm beer being spilled from someone else's cup all down my shirt. And just like that, that small moment of my drunken euphoric escape is gone. I open my eyes to see a frantic face on a guy half a foot taller than me. Which makes him freakishly tall considering I'm five foot eight. Pushing his sweaty, floppy brown hair back and out of his face, he opens his mouth in which considering the panicked look on his face I'm assuming he's about to apologize, I beat him to the chase.

"You're sorry, it wasn't your fault, it's fine," I say, trying to ring out the front of my shirt. It was bound to happen, again. I think I end up wearing beer more than I drink at these parties. I take that back, that's not possible. Before the guy can say anything, I walk off pushing through sweaty bodies. I need to get out of here. I need to find Henry.

Still pushing through countless people, I spot Henry dancing with a guy he met while we were here a few nights ago. We made a pact, we go out together and when one wants to leave, the other leaves too. I make my way up to him as the room continues to spin and the green and purple lights dance along the walls and all over people. He catches a glimpse of me and probably notices I don't look too thrilled, and also quite dizzy.

Clearly noticing I'm about to fall off my own two feet and that it's time to go, Henry states, "Hey you okay? It's late and this beer is starting to taste worse and worse by the cup. Let's get out of here." I could see the sweat dripping down his warm brown skin, how he was still dancing I couldn't understand.

I nodded, and Henry turned to the blonde-haired guy he was dancing with, whispered something in his ear, and a devilish smile appeared on the Blondie's  face. Henry then grabbed my arm gently to steady me as we made our way through all these people to get the hell out of this basement.

The cool Colorado air hits my skin as we stepped out of the house. Walking down the street, I look around seeing people coming in and out of houses left and right. Henry is almost a head taller than me, he drapes his muscular arm over my shoulder and pulls me in. I'm glad because I probably would have toppled over any second if he hadn't.

Looking up at him I say with a little wink, "You seemed to be enjoying yourself back there. And more so, enjoying Blondie."

His husky voice replies, "Blondie, and I are getting drinks tomorrow night. His name is Jonah by the—."

"Hey girl, why don't you ditch him and come up here and have a little fun with us?" A voice shouted from my right, I glanced over to see a group of guys standing on the porch of another frat house with boarded-up windows downstairs to hide the party lights and to muffle some of the overflowing music coming from inside.

"Fuck off, I'm sure you can have fun with just each other," I shout back, turning back to giggle slightly with Henry. Assholes.

Quickly jogging over to the other side of the street to put a little more distance between us and those guys, I say, "Well I think Blondie seems fun, next time we go out we'll have to upgrade this party of two to a party of three, of course except for when D and Kaia are with us." Delia, or as I call her D, is my roommate and Kaia is her long term girlfriend from her hometown that occasionally comes up to stay with us on weekends.

"Gladly. But it's always fun with just you and me, Luna. Don't think for a second I could replace my number one girl."

We both laugh, and I smile, letting him know that of course, I know that. Henry is a year older than I am. We were friends in high school and then drifted apart once Henry left for Colorado College. Next thing you know I'm at orientation at the same school two summers ago, and I see Henry as an orientation leader for a different group than what I was placed in, but make an effort to switch groups and we quickly reconnect after that. We've been attached at the hip since then. I don't know what I would do without him.

Finally, we make it to campus. My drunken warmth has fazed off by now, the cold air has slithered its way up my bare arms and I'm anxious to go inside. Henry walks me up to my dorm building, we exchange goodnights, and my cold shaky hand swipes my ID card to let me into my building. Luckily my roommate, Delia, went home for the weekend so I won't have to worry about waking her. The lock clicks as my key turns to unlock my door. I peel my jeans off and slip out of my favorite plum-colored tank, which now smells like trashy beer, and into an oversized t-shirt and slide into bed.

I roll over to check the time on the alarm clock that glows in the dark room. Three in the morning. Nothing but the humming of the air conditioner sounds the room. Silence rings in my ears.

Alone at last. No one but me and my head.

Where I wanted to be the least.