Finding You

Chapter 13

October 2019

My phone beeps, a list of messages from Sebastian.

How's the date going?
Is he nice?
Or is it a case of a total psycho and you need a fake emergency pick up.

A guy I met at a party earlier this week had asked for my number and then texted me asking me on a date for tonight. More precisely, a dinner date that started an hour ago. And yet I'm still waiting on the couch in the apartment, wearing my favorite dark plum velvet dress that has a deep v-neckline and the hem of the fitted dress stops just below my knees, paired with my leather black heeled boots that stop just an inch or two above my ankle. And no date. I messaged the guy, Sean, twice. Once forty-five minutes ago and again twenty minutes after that. Both times he read the message, but I have no response.

I message Sebastian back, well considering I'm still sitting here at the apartment and with a no show from the guy, along with read messages, I'd say it could be better. He could have been a psycho.

The three little dots appeared in the corner, soon followed by a response.

Are you serious?

I begin to type back, getting ready to say that it's no big deal when actually I feel pretty let down. I haven't had a date since junior year in high school, much less anything positive goes my way with a guy since then. It's always games that must be played, toying with my feelings and heart as if it's something that can be thrown around whenever they like. But after a handful of that over and over again late high school and last year, I've warded guys off and kept to myself. I was and am done being a part of games from boys who claim to be men. But then this week a cute guy from a party who seemed nice, pulled me back in and I fell for it. Stupid me. Another message pops up from Sebastian.

I'll be over in ten.

What?

Ten minutes go by and a knock on the door sounds. Opening it, Sebastian stands there in black jeans, a dark emerald green button-up that's three buttons open from the top, and a sleek black leather jacket with his hands tucked in the pockets of his jeans.

"What are you doing here?"

"I'm taking you out. You deserve a nice date," he says, pausing and hesitating as he looks me in the eyes, "You look beautiful. Come on." He reaches out a hand to me, waiting for my hand to grab on, letting him know that I'll go.

His sweet smile appears as my hand touches his.

—

We laughed. We ate dinner. We danced and laughed some more. Walking down the street, warm yellow outdoor string lights gleam above us, draping from storefront canopies, tying them all together as one. While walking home, the cool October air chills my bare skin, goosebumps making their appearance all up my arms. Sebastian's leather jacket makes its way over my shoulders, slowly warming my arms, while one of his arms drapes over my neck and shoulders.

"You know, I think this was better than what that date would have been if he had shown up," I say.

"Just admit it, you like my dancing. It's what made the night," Sebastian says, leaning his face to the top of my head.

"You mean you're two left feet and no rhythm hips? Yeah, you're right. Definitely my favorite part."

After getting back to my apartment, I realized how out of shape I was. I feel like all of the air was sucked out of my lungs just from climbing up three flights of stairs and walking around town. I tried to push the night to keep going as long as I could to avoid the solitude that would follow. I knew that I could invite him inside to hide from that even longer, but that would give him the opportunity to pry into my head. I feared that more than the prior. I don't want anyone else in there, much less myself.

"Thank you for tonight," I say, standing up on my toes to reach up and press my lips to his cheek. "Goodnight, Sebastian."

"Night, Loo." He says.