Blind Trust (MewGulf)

Chapter 31: What happened to Jom

‼PLEASE READ BEFORE GETTING INTO THE CHAPTER‼

TW: Harassment, self-harming.

This is probably the most difficult chapter I've ever written. I took my time to think about this particular storyline. I always had in mind doing something for Mew-Jom. Mew's trust issues can't just be because of HIM and his little devil things. Mew's problems with his family are more profound than we think.

I knew after starting this story that I wanted to include a self-harming line. This particular topic hits me personally, as I saw my best friend go through this for years. Self-harming is a coping mechanism. It can have a lot of triggers, but the most common one is to deal with stress and emotional pain. The people that do this, most of the time are suffering. My best friend did it as a way to deal with stress. All the things she got going on in her life were too much for her. I was the one that found out, even before her family, and the one that helped her find someone to help her deal with it. I stood by her for months, trying to help. Today, she's much better. She found healthier ways to deal with stress. This won't be the last chapter where I talk about it. I won't go into detail, but there will be mentions of it

Beyond this ass long note, I hope you enjoy the chapter. If the topic is too much for you, please skip it.

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POV Mew

After they left the bathroom, all dried up, Mew started to feel like he was meeting his final moments with Gulf. He felt like there was no way Gulf would look at him the same way after Mew told him what had happened with his sister, and his involvement in it.

It was raining outside, matching the gloomy mood they were wrapped up in. Thunders could be heard in the distance, making Mew snap every now and then.

- I can't do this face to face – Mew muttered.

Gulf hesitated and then reached behind him to turn the lights off.

- Come here – he murmured as he reached for Mew's hand.

Mew kicked off his shoes and followed his boyfriend as he lay down on the bed. Mew settled his back against Gulf's front and breathed in a sigh of relief when Gulf's arms came around him in a familiar hold.

They lay there for a while as the storm quieted. Lighting occasionally illuminated the room. Gulf didn't rush him, for which Mew was grateful. Mew tried to work up all the courage he had in him, to be just half as brave as Gulf said he was. Shame curled through him as he sucked in oxygen and found the words he needed to say.

- I've known I wanted to work in the entertainment industry since I was a teenager. I've always loved music and movies. They were so fascinating to me. The thought of reaching so many people through my work motivated me to keep trying – Mew thought about his beginning, how much he struggled – It wasn't until I was 21 that I found someone that helped me get into this world. His name was Amp.

Mew remembered the day like it was yesterday, how the man had found him around Siam and gave him his card to contact him if he wanted to work as a model.

- He was really nice to me. He told me I had a future because of my good looks. So I started working as a model almost immediately. I appeared in little commercials and spots, nothing fancy but I was over the moon. I felt so happy about it. The feeling of being in front of a camera was intoxicating. I knew pretty soon that's what I wanted to do with my life.

Mew went silent for a second, trying to hold back his feelings. Gulf, silent until that moment, tightened his hold around Mew.

- What happened? – Gulf whispered.