WHAT IF

The Hug (3)

           I was quiet just obeying and going a long to what he was doing.
          "Are you always like this?" He asked calmly walking to his table.
We were in either his study or home office.
          "Like how?" I asked.
          "Obedient and following along to everything." He said. Hayden sat in his seat leaning looking at me.
I totally lacked what to say.
          "Maybe yes, maybe no." I said but its positive, I no longer know how to decide for me.
          "Why did you get me out of there, excluding me here." I asked.
          "You seemed uncomfortable with people and your smile changed from true to fake." He deeply said.
I lost words, my tongue was stuck.
          "And it's not the first time I have seen you like that," He said.
This brought many questions to my head
         "At the fundraising." Hayden added.
I looked at him frozen yet sad, it was like he was stimulating my tears. 
    
         "Here is your birthday gift." I handed him the bag with a smile trying to change the atmosphere.
         "Happy birthday." I added.
Hayden opened up the gift looking at it, his expression was confusing, I was not sure if he liked it or not.
        "Do you like it or not?" I finally asked breaking the silence.
He raised his eyes looking at me.
        "Why did you buy me this?" He deeply yet calmly asked.
        "Well since Amanda always mentioned that you were always busy with work, I figured I should buy you a tie, something essential in your daily life." I said.
Hayden giggled a bit.
       "Do you know what it means for a woman to buy a man a tie?" He asked.
       "Does it mean anything?" I asked as well.
Hayden laughed leaning forward.
       "You are mine." He sexily said.
       "Sorry what?" I thought I had heard poorly.
       "A woman buys it for a man in away of telling him 'You're mine'." He repeated.
I felt embarrassed, shy and speechless at the same time.
       "But,...I didn't ....well..." All words and sentences failed to formulate.
       "A mother can buy it for a son that's okay but the meaning changes when a wife buys it for a husband or when a woman buys it for a man like now." He assured me.
       "But uhm, you have received enough from  your mother and wife." I said with a nervous small laugh.
      "No." Hayden said.
       "What!" I was shocked, I wanted it to be that I heard wrong.
       "I said no, it's actually my first time." He confirmed.
       "I will take it back." I said reaching for it but he pulled it away faster.
       "Thank you, I will treasure it." He said with a smile.
      "Have a seat" He offered.

        Slowly and unsurely I sat in the comfortable chair before him, I looked down at my hands as I thought about the tie and the fact that we are here together with my Best friend's father that I first found attractive.
          "It's  your birthday, won't people ask for you?" I finally broke the silence.
          "As you said it's my birthday." He said so unbothered.
          "People expect you to be there." I replied.
          "I'm not like you Val." He said raising his eyes to me.
          "What's that supposed to mean?" I asked, I felt so offended.
          "Don't get angry, you're just there to please others." He said bluntly.
I new he was right but that was so blunt, I didn't want to hear it from someone I barely know, I got so pissed.
          "Excuse me sir but you have no right to speak to me like that." I said angrily then stood up to leave. 
          "That's how you should have reacted to your husband last time at the party." He said so calmly to me, I had almost reached the door but that froze me.
          "Don't act it up in front of me yet when he was  strangling you, pushing you down the stairs you seemed so obedient, not bothered at all." He said, his voice a little raised like as if he was disciplining his daughter.
I was angry, hurt, pained and sad all at once, I slowly turned looking at him.
          "Hayden!!!!!!" I called so powerless and embarrassed.
          "I felt like barging in when I saw you leaping to a fractured ankle but I was so shocked to see you in front there giving us a speech and praising your husband." He added.
He stood up walking close to me slowly. I had never felt this vulnerable in front of someone.
Hayden walked close to me tightly embracing me into his hands. I wanted to push him away.
          "It's okay Val." He said and all my energy was drained.
          "I totally get you, to be in the wrong situation yet you continue to stay in it." He added. His voice was soft and quiet like a whisper, his words became my breaking point, I found myself tearing up.
          "It's okay, cry till it is no longer heavy." He added.
I buried my face in his shoulder bursting into tears, his hug was comforting, warm and motherly, like as if everything was going to be okay. It was the feeling I had in his hands , I cried my all, his hands moved up and down gently on my back like as if he was petting his dog or cat. After all my tears, I didn't move my head off him, now I was feeling ashamed for crying like baby in front of him.
          "Thank you." I said quietly.
          "No need, though it's high time you stopped allowing him to treat you like that." Hayden said.
I nodded my head saying yes though couldn't promise on that.
          "Valerie!!!! " Amanda called from outside the office.
I immediately pulled myself away from Hayden,
          "I'm here." I answered cleaning my face not to show that I was crying.
She opened the door entering inside.
          "Thanks daddy." Amanda immediately said when she entered.
          "Always." He smiled.
          "It's time for games." Amanda excitedly said.
She stood up grabbing my hand and we moved out, Hayden followed us from behind back to the party.
          "Do you know anything about ties?" I asked Amanda as we sat down in the circle.
          "Well there are beliefs but I don't know them well." Amanda said.