A forbidden love

chapter 5

Connor

I headed back home, My mind spinning out of control. How could this be happening. I don't know how to raise a kid or be father but most of all I don't know how I can do this alone.

When I get inside my house I break down crying. This can't be happening how could I be so stupid having sex with someone I don't know, ok he was my mate and my heart is being torn apart knowing he doesn't want me.

I know I have to make a choice about what am going to do, but what I do know is that no matter that this shouldn't be possible. I am keeping my baby I place my hand on my stomach as if I can feel my little miracle.

"Just you and me huh we will be ok I promise"

2 months later

It's getting harder the bigger I get to get out of bed. I can feel my baby moving inside me. It feels amazing I can't believe how quick the past 2 months have gone. I haven't heard form Poseidon, I still think about him everyday but I know I won't see him again. and as much as it kills me that my own mate doesn't want me. I have to carry on for the sake of my baby. I can't believe how much the pack has supported me especially Jax. He has had a room built onto the pack house for when I give birth in a little over 4 months. Turns out I will need to have c-section which I am actually relived about. I couldn't imagine what other ways to give birth. Jax has also given me my own guard his name is blaze he is absolutely gorgeous and in another life I would have fancied him. But now no one compares to Poseidon. How sad is that I am pining after a man that hasn't given me another thought. Today I find out what am having. Its exciting finally finding if my little miracle is a boy or girl. I've also been wondering if he to she will be a wolf like me or what ever Poseidon was we won't know until it's born.

I arrive at the room Jax made for me. The doctor already there by the bed waiting for me.

"Hi doc"

"Hello Connor how are you feeling"

"Fine tired and fat but happy "

"Connor your not fat your beautiful and feeling tired is normal at this point are you ready for this"

"Yep"

I go and sit on the bed. The doctor lifts up my shirt and puts gel on my stomach. He rubs the scan machine over my stomach. I can hear my baby's heartbeat. It always brings tears to my eyes it's times like this I wish Poseidon was here.

"Well everything is normal. Although it appears you are carrying more water than normal, but it's nothing to worry about. Now are you sure you wish to know the baby's sex"

"Yes please"

"Your having a healthy baby boy congratulations"

I look at the screen I can see my little boy.

"Hello my beautiful baby boy I love you"

Blaze is outside waiting for me.

"So what's the verdict"

"It's a boy"

Blaze raps me in his big arms spinning me round. I laugh at moments like these, it's hard to forget he is not my baby's father. I know that there can never be anything between us I guess am meant to be alone. If I have my son then that's ok.

I head back to my house to the baby's room. I have been doing little bits here and there. Ever since I found out I was pregnant I decided on a under water theme. Complete with a trident. I don't know where the idea came I just had a dream one night. I guess it stuck with me I can feel my son moving around inside me.

"Not long now baby"

I have been thinking about names for the baby the past week and I decided to name. Baby storm because he took my world by storm. Plus I have always loved anything to do with water. I love looking out at a storm raging outside clearing anything in its path. I hope my son will be like a storm never letting anything get in his way.

For his middle name I chose lake because that's where I first made love to his father. Although I will won't be telling him that until he is at least 30.

I wish his father could be apart of his life, even if he doesn't want to be apart of mine. I tried to find him once but with no last name and no clue where he came from. I have no idea where to start I haven't even heard from Zeus so am at a loss at what to do.

"God Poseidon where are you, your son needs you"

So do I, but I can't bring myself to say that. Even though no one can hear me.

"Guess it's you and me storm I hope am enough"