Written in the stars

Crashing down

Jennie

"I'm sorry honey, but your father and I are getting a divorce. Our fights are taking a toll on everyone, even you and this is the only solution we could think of. I'm sorry Jen..."

As soon as those words came out of my mom's mouth,

I ran, ran as far away as I could.

Because that's the coward I am.

I run at just about every problem I have.

I feel hopeless.

I don't know where to go.

Suddenly, I feel trembling.

That familiar fear.

It hits me.

I'm having another panic attack.

I can't move.

Then, I hear a voice.

"Nini?"

"Oh my god Nini, not again!" She mutters.

It's Irene.

She brings me into her house,

Puts a blanket over my head and tells me to breathe.

I try to concentrate on my breathing and eventually calm down.

"Nini, what the hell happened?" She asks.

So I tell her just about everything,

Like last time.

"So let me get this straight, you like Yoongi but he likes Nayeon and you being the blindly dumb but amazing friend you are, agreed to help him, breaking your own heart in the process, and your parents are getting a divorce?" She questions.

I nod.

"Jennie Ruby Jane Kim, you can't be acting like a freaking martyr for the rest of your life! You have to learn to wear your heart on your sleeve and not keep it hidden, making yourself suffer in the process! That's not healthy! Those kinds of things cause depression and in worst cases, depression causes....." She says trailing off on the last part.

"I can't have you accepting this and trying to bury it deep down and acting like your feelings don't matter" She says.

I nod again.

She's right.

But in this situation, I just can't.

Things are different.

I don't want to ruin one of the only and best friendships,

I've ever had, over stupid feelings.

I'm sorry, Irene.