the spark we lost

29

The next day I spoke to Alexis. "What did you tell Tom about me?" I asked her.

"Me? she said." Nothing."

I sighed. I'd been going over the forehead kiss in my mind all morning, and I realized that someone must've said something. Someone must've told him not to move too fast.

"Okay, not you," I said. " Sabrina? What'd she tell him?"

Alexis took a deep breath. I could imagine her running her hand through her hair on the other side of the phone. I haven't seen her in over a year, since my last work trip in L.A. She was such a huge part of my world back then, and just... isn't anymore. It's kind of sad that I don't really miss her. I guess people change, lives change. We know that better than anybody.

"She told him you just got out of something serious," Alexis said over the phone."She told him to be patient. Not to break you."

I cringed, even though Sabrina was probably right in saying all those things.

"And what did he say?" I asked.

"He said not only would he not break you, that he'd help put you back together."

I leaned against the back of my couch. "Well," I said." That's bold. What's his deal? Does he have some sort of savior complex? A need to be a hero?"

"He's a really good guy, " Alexis told me. " His friends are pretty much asshats, but he's really decent. Not that Chris wasn't, but . . I guess I'm just saying... give him a shot Lana."

I felt tears welling up in my eyes again at the mention of your name. I needed to stop that from happening, but I had no idea how.

"I don't know if I can," I said, wiping my nose with the back of my hand.

"It takes a guy to get over a guy," Alexis said then. "And believe me, I should know."

I let out a short burst of sound that was caught somewhere between a laugh and a sob.

"Seriously," Alexis said.," give him a chance. If nothing else, he'll show you that there are other good, smart people out there who think you're pretty great."

I nodded, even though she couldn't see me. "I'll give him a chance." I told her.

"Nothing more than I can ask for," she said. " Expect maybe plans for next Friday night? You know that hot guy I met on L train? He's in a piece of performance art on the Lower East Side. Can you go with me?"

"Is this the one with the green hair?" I asked.

"Ew, no," Alexis said. "Did I not tell you? He picked his nose at dinner. Done. This is the one with the Buddy Holly glasses and the beard."

"Got it," I said. "Count me in." Even though really the last thing I wanted to do was go to see performances art starting some wacko Alexis met on the subway. But it was better than missing you.