Is it really worth it?

"Have a seat, Captain."

At 7 am Maya's alarm rang. She began to wiggle herself out of bed and shut off the annoying sounds coming from it. Once it was off she fell back onto her bed. It didn't leave her alone about 15 minutes later it began to ring again and this time she was forced to fully wake up.

*ugh, shut up. I'm up!*

She thought even though she knew thinking it wouldn't stop the sounds blaring loudly through her tiny room. She got dressed rapidly, went downstairs, and was now seated next to a brunette. April was her name. If Maya remembered correctly. She stared down at her plate filled with a piece of bread some jam and scrambled eggs. It felt almost endearing knowing exactly what was going through her head in this instant. She knew it all a little too well. Maya's plate was still empty but most likely not for long. These cooking people were like hawks always on your back making sure you have enough to eat.

Speaking of the devil. Moments after the thought ran through Maya's head a nice-looking lady was placing scrambled eggs on her plate. "Eat up." She said with a wide smile. If it were up to Maya she would have thrown the eggs in her face. Making sure the annoying smile disappeared instantly. Instead, Maya just smiled back. Now she was glaring at her plate the same way April just was. The thoughts were about to flood in and make her feel terrible even though she hadn't taken in a single bite yet. She was used to these.

Maya managed to finish breakfast and now had free time till 10:30. Which was not a lot since she was forced to stay seated. As soon as she walked out of the dining hall a familiar voice drung into her ears. It was August.

"And Captain, did you survive breakfast?" Her smile was huge and she seemed awfully chipper for being in an ED clinic. Maya turned to face August who was closer than expected. She took a step back making space between them. "I did. Sorry I don't have too much time I still wanted to call my fiancee before I met with Mrs. Wright." Maya answered and it came off as extremely rude but Maya didn't really care. She did want to talk to Carina before and the entire situation between them was still remotely unnatural. "No problem Cap." She still seemed to be chipper.

"Hello, Bambinaaa," Carina's voice came from Maya's phone speaker. And for the first time today, she had one of those wide smiles upon her lips. "Hey, babe" she answered with a smile.

"So? How is it? Is your room big enough do I have to talk to them? Have you made any new friends? Is the food good? Oh, wait ignore the last question." As always Carina was full of energy and seemed very interested.

"It's okay for being a clinic. Yes, my room is definitely big enough." Maya paused deliberating if she should tell Carina about August. And she decided against it. Carina worried enough anyway she didn't have to worry about another woman.

"There are a lot of great people but we haven't had the chance to talk that much. And the food is... Okay."

They talked for a little longer. Carina gave her the gossip on Grey-Solan in which Maya was very invested and updated her on 19. The part-time captain was okay. At least that's what Maya was told. She purposely didn't want to know who it was. Even though she knew this was necessary she hated the thought of giving 19 to another captain. Especially a cisgender, straight, white, male. She didn't know that was the case but with the knowledge of how society worked this was most likely.

"Tell Andy I miss her and check up on the team for me, yeah? I have to go now. I love you, honey. Talk to you soon." On that note, Maya hung up the phone. Still giddy and smiley from the call. Even after years of being together Carina still made her nervous.

"Have a seat, Captain." Mrs, Wright ordered Maya. She obeyed. Once again looking around the office and it still made her uncomfortable. For minutes none of them said a word. They just sat there in complete silence. Maya was far too stubborn to say something.

"So, Maya" it seemed like Mrs. Wright gave up the battle. "Tell me about your family, will you." Maya flinched at that demand. Were her daddy issues so visible? She knew they weren't but the thought made her smile. Which was probably a way to defuse the situation. "Uh, I have one." She answered sternly. "Yes, Maya I figured as much but tell me about it."
Maya thought of a way to avoid this question and started to talk about the station but somehow this didn't seem to satisfy Mrs. Wright. She kept nudging and wouldn't leave the topic alone. "Fine," Maya said almost screaming the word.

"Fine. I have a brother with whom I've recently made contact again. He came by while I was in a coma and got to meet my fiancee. They fought but it turned out fine I guess. My mom is I don't know where since she didn't want to rid herself of my abusive father but she knows my fiancee as well since they met once. Yeah, and my dad was just my dad but I've already discussed this topic enough. I'm over him"

Mrs. Wright looked truly stunned by the information I had just delivered. She seemed deep in thought and presumed to look at Maya.

"You were in a coma?!" She whimpered almost frightened. "And you have a fiancee?"

Maya had forgotten Mrs. Wright wasn't present in group therapy and didn't know the detail about having a fiancee. It didn't seem as important to Maya as curing her eating disorder but whatever. The coma part might have been crucial information for the clinic but it might be a little late to register that fact.

"I was and I do. Her name is Carina and she's amazing. She is the one motivating me to be here." Maya answered. Glad she managed to dodge the family topic. She gave details about the coma and Mrs. Wright seemed stunned. Sadly Maya didn't know how long she'd manage to avoid the topic but for now, this was good enough.

They talked for a while more until she was finally free to go. Now having a very short amount of free time before having to go to lunch.

"Maya!!" August's voice called Maya. She sounded anxious or excited, Maya couldn't tell exactly. "Someone is here to see you," August said. Now sounding mad in a way. Who could be visiting Maya? And why now?