[TechnoBook]

💔 [Scars Hold Memories]

Ship: None

WARNING, this chapter contains:
- heavy angst
- mental illnesses
- children being forced to fight wars
- multiple attempts at suicide
- gore
- blood
- self-harm
- self-hate
- body horror
- hurting someone to get them back to their sences before they kill themself
- out-of-body experience
- Distancing yourself
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[13.8.2021]

Everyone somehow (haven't decided how yet) looks into Technos past for certain illnesses, so they can know how to help him deal with them.

1th memory:
(He has beautiful sky blue eyes with brown hair that showed signs of turning pink at the very bottom, his hair length was a normal short almost covering his eyes but not reaching past his ears, but extremely tangly and fluffy so his little elf ears were hardly visible)
(This is the very first time his illness showed itself.)

They see a very young Techno (8y/o) not being able to fall asleep.
So he distracted himself by playing with his plushies.
But then Techno flinched and all of a sudden his beautiful sky blue eyes turned dull. He suddenly didn't feel like he had control of his own body anymore.
His body started to move on its own, making him sit up, face his bed frame and bang his head at it with enough force to get a nasty sound in return.
The damage made him pass out but before he did he saw with a blurry vision his parents bursting into his room to see Technos bloody face, hair, bedding, bed frame and even the wall a little.

2nd memory:
(Techno still has sky blue eyes but just a little duller, his hair is almost completely pink now (only the roots are still brown), and now he has it in a pony tail since it reaches past his shoulders, his hair is wavy, he now has a few scars from dealing with the war and his illness for years, but the one that stud out the most is the one on his face that anyone who looks at it will think 'how the hell is he alive', it was the scar from when his illness first struck him.)

They see a teen Techno (16y/o).
The one that was abandoned after his mental illness was found and dropped into the military because he was a piglin hybrid (deemed one of the strongest species of a hybrid).
He's in his room with his service dog Floof.
It happened again like almost every month now.
He shakely exhaled and his hands started shaking out of nowhere and his eyes dulled horribly, almost turning his bright blue eyes black.
Floof realised and started to lick his hands to help but what usually helps seems to worsen the state as Techno hurries to scratch at his arms, neck and face.
Floof let out a startled yelp but quickly bit (not enough to actually hurt) Technos hands and with the help of his paws removed Technos hands back down to his chest.
But then Techno seemed to horribly flinch and he all of a sudden stood up making Floof fall off of him in the process and started to bang his arms and legs into slightly sharp edge he could find while Floof tried to stop him by biting his pants and pulling him away but it got worse when Techno deemed his hands bloodied enough and started to smash his head on the enged making Floof start to urgently bark at him.
Floof realized he couldn't do anything when Techno just kept on going so he went to the door and started barking and whining as loud as he could while desperately scratching against the door trying to get someone's attention.
The people around Techno's room came out and rushed to his door after realising what the barking and scratching meant and they busted in and tackled a bloody Techno to the ground and held him down on every single limb.
He was then escorted to the medics where they sadly reported that what damage had been done was done and that Techno isn't allowed to participate in any war related stuff anymore because his condition is only worsening and worsening.

3rd memory:
(Techno with crimson eyes and many more scars, his hair is in a long braid that reaches past his waist, it was a little curly but almost straightened out completely.)

They see a prenest (DreamSMP-retirement arc) day Techno (immortal) laying in bed with Steve laying on the floor leaning against the bed.
Then Techno takes a shuddered breath and the next time he blinks his eyes are a very deep dulled vine red eyes and his body goes limp.
Steve goes tense after sniffing the air, realising something is amiss.
A few seconds pass and Techno starts to drill his sharp claws into his own arms, Steve immediately jumps up into a standing position and pushes his snout into Technos palm to stop his digging. Technos hands go limp and Steve can freely move them, but then Techno brings his hands to his face and was about to scratch his eyes out when Steve lighty bit both his hands and forcefully showed them to Technos' sides.
Steve knew Techno wasn't done so he did what he was trained to do and layed down on Techno to make sure he couldn't move a muscle anymore.
Techno only stared off into space, his expression not changing ever since he entered this mental state, for a few seconds before he exhaled and held his breath. Steve got startled at this since this is the first time in his service that Techno had tried to suffocate himself. He panicked and bit Techno on his shoulder after a good minute when his emergency licks and snorts and nuges didn't work to make Techno even falter.
Thankfully that brought Techno back to reality as he was about to shout from the pain but only started to choke and desperately take in big gasps of air while Steve comforted him.

[Word count: 1015]

GUYS PLEASE WHY CAN'T I WRITE SMUT AS LEGENDARY AS I WRITE ANGST?!