Temptation 18+

Chapter 43

(Jimin POV)

When he asked me that question my heart sunk, because he was right. How would he be able to trust me knowing I didn't have full control over myself. If rolls were switched how would I react? I know I wouldn't be able to trust someone like me. The more thoughts that ran through my head the more I started doubting myself. What if I can't keep my promise to her or myself? That maybe just maybe I would do it again. What if I lose control over myself again? What would I do then? What would Yoongi do then? I felt myself growing more anxious as the thoughts filled my mind. "Jimin calm down a bit." Y/n said snapping me back into reality. I didn't realize that I started fidgeting with my sleeves that came down just past my fingers. "You're right I wouldn't even be able to trust myself." I said just as I said that I felt a tear run down my check. No don't I thought to myself which clearly didn't work because soon after tears started streaming down my face. I threw my hands up covering my face. "Calm down Jimin this is why we are talking about it. We are just trying to fully understand each other." Y/n said in a calming tone. "She's right Jimin there's no need to get upset." Yoongi said following her statement. 

"I know, but Yoongi is right. What if I am unable to control myself. What if I can't keep my promise?" I ask before getting cut off. "That's also why we are her to get to the bottom of everything." Yoongi says. "If you feel up to it why don't we start from the bottom of why this all started?" Y/n asked. "Well when I seen you I thought you were very pretty, and the more we hung out the more my feelings for you grew. When I found out that Yoongi kissed you it made me jealous, and at first I just wanted to make Yoongi feel the jealousy that I was feeling, but it started getting out of hand. I knew it was, but by that time I couldn't stop what I was doing. Then when she kissed me trying to prove a point that's when I lost what control I had left. I knew I was getting out of hand, but I felt like no one would have believed me, so I just tried to fight it myself. I don't even know what made me go to her room that day. I just remember telling myself this is a bad idea, but I couldn't stop. While I was doing what I was doing I kept telling myself I need to stop this is all wrong, but I couldn't." I say as I break down more then I already was. I pulled my knees up to my chest wrapping my arms around them trying to calm myself down. "Do you know why you felt like you lost control, because I've never seen you act like this before. Even with my last girlfriend you didn't do this." Yoongi asked. "I don't really know I just know that I wanted to stop, but it felt like something was taking control over me. This whole situation scared me, because I've never acted like this." I say in between breaths. "Do you think it might have something to do with how your dad was when he was drunk?" "Well... It wasn't just when he was drunk." "Wait what are you talking about?" Y/n asked. "I'll let Jimin explain." Yoongi replied. I looked up at them then quickly dropped my head back down. I hesitated for a little before taking a deep breath to speak. I never wanted to talk about what happened with my dad. "I guess I'll start from the beginning since Y/n doesn't know any of this. When I was a child I would witness my dad abuse and rape my mom almost everyday. Every time she would try and fight back he would hit her and tell her he gets what he wants. I remember always telling myself that I would never be like my dad, but when I did what I did to Y/n that's when I realized I'm just like him. It didn't help me feel any better about the situation knowing I lost control over myself either." I said not moving my head from my knees. 

The more I talked about what happened in my past and what I did to Y/n the more tears flowed out of my eyes down my face. It felt like I could wring out the tears in my sleeves with how full they were. "Jimin please calm down." Y/n said in a worried voice. "I can't!" I raised my shaky voice not meaning to. "I can't Y/n I've done the worse thing anyone could ever do. On top of all the things that's already happened to you. I'll never be able to fully forgive myself for what I've done." I said looking for a split second then hid back into my knees. "Jin-" I heard followed by a loud thud making me raise my head up. It didn't take long for me to realize Yoongi was dragging himself in the floor to me. "Yoongi! Are you ok?" Y/n asked sounding panicked. He didn't make any sound as he finally got to me lifting himself up then wrapping me into a hug. I was having to hold up all his body weight as he silently held onto me. "Yoongiah! The hell were you thinking. Why didn't you ask for help." Y/n said. "Jimin needed me more." Yoongi replied. "Oh yea look at me I'm Yoongi." She said just before throwing herself onto the floor followed by a grunt. "Yea didn't think that through did you?" Yoongi said making me let out a slight giggle that didn't last long." Before I could say anything I feel a pillow hit me in the face. "What was that for?" Yoongi asked holding the back of his head with one arm. "For being a smart ass." Y/n said. "Well don't for get I'm here." I said then started laughing after that they both started laughing with me. 

"Hey guys I came to check... What the hell happened? Why is everyone in the floor? Yoongi you're not trying to kill him are?" Jin asked just as fast as he walked into the room.  "It's a long story." Y/n said mixed with a giggle. "Yea it really is." Yoongi said. I couldn't get myself to say anything as I continued to hold Yoongi up. To be honest I loved this it felt like we were family again in a way. We were actually able to laugh instead of just fight like we have been for a while. No matter what I have to do I plan to always keep my promise that it wont happen again. Whatever feelings I have for Y/n I know I'll never be Yoongi to her. I know this and I've known this for a while. The only thing I hate about everything is what I did. "Well I'm glad you are having fun, but it's really not good for the both of you to be on the floor with the injuries that you both have. I'm going to get Wonho to help me get you up, and please promise me I won't find either of you back onto the floor." Jin said breaking me from my thoughts. He slowly shook his head then left the room holding onto the bridge of his nose. The room went silent after that as we just looked at each other. My eyes were still puffy from all the crying, and I managed to prop Yoongi on to the wall I was leaning against. You could look at Y/n and tell she was in pain from how she was sitting unable to lean against anything due to her back but couldn't lean forward due to being so far into her pregnancy. "So have you thought about what you are going to name the baby?" I asked to break the silent a bit. "Well we really haven't given it any thoughts." Y/n said looking over at Yoongi. "Well it might be a good idea to start thinking about." I say as I look at the both of them. "We know, but we haven't really had the time to talk about it. Yoongi says while looking over at me then towards Y/n. "You do have a point. A lot has happened since the day we found out. Most of it was because of me." I say sadly. "Jimin lets not worry about that right now you're already upset, and now we are all on the floor." Yoongi said. "Because of you, deciding to army crawl across the floor instead of asking for help." Y/n said in a sassy voice. "I didn't need any help." Yoongi said sticking his tongue out a little. "Do you really want to go there?" Y/n said grabbing the pillow then raising it over her shoulder. "Yoon-Yoongi let her win this time." I say putting my hand over my face just in-case. Just as I heard Yoongi say no I prepared my face for a face blow from the pillow.

 After a few seconds of not getting hit I open one eye to the that she didn't have the pillow anymore. I looked up to see Wonho holding the pillow then watched as he threw it onto the bed. Y/n looked at him then started laughing. "So who wants off the floor first?" Wonho said with a chuckle. "Get Y/n up please." Yoongi said from over my shoulder. Wonho nodded then walked past us to gently help Y/n up off the floor. Her baby belly was starting to look bigger then her entire body. I couldn't help it as I watched her belly as she slowly got put back into the bed. That's going to be my niece one day, and I really could have hurt her. Why am I so stupid? I asked myself as I lowed my head down reverting my eyes down to look at the floor. Moments later I feel a hand start patting the top of my head. "Jimin stop thinking about it." Yoongi says as he stops patting my head so Wonho could help him up to his feet. "Look I hate to break up this cute bro moment, but can you please explain to me why you all are in the floor, and why the hell was I almost hit with a pillow?" Wonho asked. "Well you see Jimin was crying so this dummy decided to try and get up, but i guess forgot he couldn't walk and fell to the ground." Y/n said with the same amount of sass. "I told you I didn't need help. I knew what I was doing, I just didn't expect to reach the ground so quickly. It's not my fault you decided to throw yourself into the floor trying to be a smartass." Yoongi huffed. "You know what Yoongi!" Y/n said before grabbing a pillow then swinging it at Yoongi hitting Wonho in the process. "Hey You could have waited for me to sit him down." Wonho said. "Welcome to my world, that happened to me just a bit ago." I said. "Yoongi your woman is crazy I don't see how you deal with her." Wonho said as he put Yoongi down on the bed. "I'm going to call Jin and tell him all of you are ganging up on me." Y/n said acting like she was going to cry. "No no I'm sorry Y/n." Before we could act, move, or say anything three pillows went flying each hitting their target. "How in the?" Wonho askes. "Did you forget I'm one of their best shots? Y/n asked. "I don't know if I should feel proud or hurt by this." yoongi said while holding his chest. 

"Why is there a pillow in the hallway?" Jin asked as he walked into the room. Oh here we go I thought to myself as I heard a sniffle come from Y/n. "Why is my baby crying?!" Jin asked as he ran over to her almost tripping over my leg. "They were being mean to me." Y/n mumbled out clear enough for us to understand her. "Why were you being mean to her?!" He asked as he turned to us. " We weren't she's the one throwing pillows at us." Yoongi said. "Wonho called me crazy." Y/n sniffled as she talked. "Why would you do that?!" He said turning to Wonho. "She hit me and Yoongi with a pillow." Wonho said defending himself. "You really called my baby crazy because of a pillow? Everyone out Wonho grab Yoongi. I want everyone out besides me and Y/n.