Paradise Lost [Tokyo Revengers]

Chapter 45

Chapter 45:

I couldn't sleep that night, all I did was sit down on my bed and stared at the Black Dragons' uniform hanging on my cabinet.

It's been 4 days since, Mikey has been calling me non-stop to check up on me but all I said was my parents are in town so I can't really talk to him right now. That was obviously a lie, I haven't celebrated Christmas with my parents in over 8 years.

What am I going to do now?

Tonight is Christmas eve, Mikey and I were supposed to go out tonight but how could I? I told Taiju I'd cut ties with Toman.

I asked Inui if I could talk to Mikey one last time, to tell him I'd want to leave Toman once and for all, and he allowed me to.

But I never had the courage to actually tell Mikey.

"Knock, knock!" I heard Mikey say from outside my apartment. My heart started going crazy, I wasn't expecting him to be here.

I got up from my bed and opened the door for him.

"Aka-chin, let's go on a date!" He said with a bright smile plastered on his face.

My heart ached.

I agreed to go out with Mikey, not to go out on a date, but to finally cut ties with him and with Toman.

"We should go to Musashi Shrine and pray, just like Shinichiro used to do during Christmas," Mikey said excitedly.

I hate to ruin the mood. He looked so happy.

"Mikey, I have to tell you something," I told him, he stopped midway through his tracks and turned to face me. 

"What's wrong?" He asked confused.

"I think we should break up," I told him, his eyes grew wide, he was completely taken aback by what I said. He was not expecting it at all.

"Why?" Was all he could say.

"I joined the Black Dragons," I told him, I took a deep long breath before telling him the reason why we should break up. "I still love Shinichiro-kun, I only used you to get over him but I couldn't" 

He didn't show any emotions and just stared at me.

"I lied, I don't love you," I told Mikey, I was fighting back the urge to cry but sucked it up. 

I love Mikey, but I don't want anyone to get hurt. I had to lie to Mikey that I don't love him so I can protect everyone. I didn't want to lie, I wanted to be with Mikey forever, but what can I do?

If I don't do this, Mitsuya is going to get hurt! Takemichi and Chifuyu are going to get hurt! Hakkai and Yuzuha will get hurt too if I don't do anything about the Black Dragons.

I don't want to lose any more of the founding members.

"If that's how you really feel, who am I to stop you," Mikey said, still emotionless. He turned his back on me and started walking off.

As he was far enough from me, I started breaking down. I cried like a child losing his favorite toy, I fell on my knees and just starting balling. But what can I do? 

"Fuck, why does this hurt more than it should," I said in between sobs as I continue to cry pathetically in the empty streets of Shibuya.

This is fine.

...

I was told by Inui that the Black Dragons are supposed to meet near the church at 11 pm, I grabbed my Black Dragons uniform and headed out.