𝐆𝐎𝐎𝐃 𝟒 𝐔, dreamwastaken

epilogue

REAL LIFE !

Only a short few days after the announcement of their relationship, the couple was feeling really good about where they stood and the direction this relationship was going. Their schedules definitely clashed, but they were going to make it work. She had classes and clinical for her nursing courses, plus long shifts for work at a local store so she could pay her bills and tuition. While Clay had a looser schedule, it was hard to work around his extremely messed up sleep schedule, planned streams and recording / editing videos. They were going to have to set aside time for the other, but they were determined to make it work.

Clay rarely left his house beside going to see his girlfriend and his family, or picking up take out for himself and Sapnap. Today though he felt like going on a nice drive to just unwind and listen to some music. Lila was busy with school and Sapnap was busy making plans to visit Karl again. It didn't help that his other best friend George was out filming for one of Tommy's vlogs so he didn't even have him to hang out with on call.

He spent an hour just driving around Orlando, vibing as he listened to the playlist that Lila and him had created. When he decided he was done, he stopped by his mail box to collect the mail. He didn't look through it, just throwing it into his passenger seat before proceeding to drive up his driveway and into his garage.

It wasn't until he threw his keys down on his kitchen table that he looked through the contents of the mail. A light blue envelope caught his eye at the bottom of the stack. He pulled it away from the rest, eyes scanning the printed address. To the one I almost lost <3

He was quite confused, but was certain it was from his girlfriend. But why would Lila be sending him a letter? He thought that ended since they got back together. Either way he was intrigued by what might be written within the envelope. So he delicately ripped opened the envelope to reach the letter, pulling it out to see the same handwriting he had gotten to know and love.

Dear Clay,

My beloved. I bet you are so confused. Asking yourself why I would be writing you another letter when I could simply come to your house or call you. But it just felt right to write another letter, probably the last one now. Kinda sad that this will be the end of what brought us back together in the first place. Oh well, we will find new things to do. Maybe you'll write me little notes again. Those were so fucking cute. Please write me some more. ANYWAY.

I know we already suck at this relationship, and never have time for each other. I'm working super hard to create the time for you, and I know you are trying your best as well. Believe me, your efforts are not going unnoticed. I don't blame either of us for the lack of time, but soon it'll be better. I graduate in the spring from nursing school (hopefully), and I will then just have to focus on my job at the hospital. All of my time besides that will be dedicated to you, my beloved boyfriend.

I know on your end that you're trying to plan streams ahead of time, so that you can figure out times when you're completely available as well. Plus, you've built up a solid amount of videos so that you won't have to film as many since you have a plethora of videos to upload. Let's not forget how you literally schedule texts to send to me in the morning before school or work since you know you won't be up. Even though your sleep schedule is majorly messed up, you still do little things for me in the morning to remind me how much you care. The text I got this morning was: "good morning Li <3 hope you have an amazing day! go nail that nursing exam that you've been studying so hard for. i know you'll do great(: i love you <3 "

Our relationship will work out because of the little things we do and how strong our love is for each other. I know we will make it so please don't worry about not seeing me as much. I understand that we are both trying, and I have faith in us to make it through. Sapnap has told me how much you worry about us, so STOP WORRYING CLAY.

There's something else I want to get off my chest. Please don't feel bad about this because honestly it's over and done with, but I just have to say it. I was so hurt when you broke up with me and then just stopped all communication with me. It really hurt. My best friend and boyfriend gone within a day. It kind of ruined me for a while, which I know I've already talked about in all those letters. But I've already begun to think about it since we got back together. Did I forgive you too quickly? Are we moving too fast? I know you're trying so hard to earn my full trust back, but will that day ever come? I hope so. While I believe I made the right decision to get back with you, the questions still flash in my mind. I should be hating you for what you said and did. But yet here I am, still loving you.

During the time of our break up, I didn't hate you. I couldn't. I was hurt and broken, and completely and utterly mad at you. But never a feeling a true hatred for you like I said in my first letter. I said that out of anger, but I didn't mean it. A part of me hoped that in the end it would be you. That we'd get back together and be end game.

I was right to keep that hope because it is you. It'll always be you, Clay. You're the one person I feel safest with. The one I can talk to about anything. The one I never get bored of. The one who brings out my best self. The one who made me realize that I don't need to change myself to fit in, and that I should just be myself. The one I want to spend all my time with. The one I want to be with forever. My soulmate. I love you, Clay, and I'm so glad we are giving this another try.

I think this statement is only right to make in this final letter so here it is: You finally got your girl back. Good for you, Clay. ;)

Love always and forever,
Lila Nolan 🦋

The boy chuckled at the last line of the letter as he put it down. He didn't expect any less from the girl. The letter was reassuring in the way that Lila acknowledged that she had complete faith in their relationship and knew that they would make it in the end. It was also reassuring that despite his mistakes, he was going to gain her full trust back so that they would be end game like she hoped. It also made Clay come to terms with the fact that he felt the exact same way as her.

In the end, it would always be her.

And it would always be him.

And you know what? Good for them! ;)

Author's Note:
**This needs to be edited still, but I wanted to publish it since I know people are waiting on it.   I kinda hate this, but I wasn't sure exactly how to end it so this is what I have come up with for now. Maybe i'll tweak it when I edit this book fully! ANYWAY I hope you all enjoyed Good 4 U!! This book was super fun to write, and I can't wait to write more MCYT in the future!