Silhouette | J.Potter

Chapter 74

TW:skipping meals

We made multiple potions. James definitely stole some samples, I wasn't the potions police, I didn't care. One of the potions we did make was amortentia. I'm pretty sure Slughorn is obsessed with the damn potion. I tried not to breathe in as we made it. I didn't need some bloody potion confusing me.

A large group of us walked to DADA. Apparently the professor has a surprise for us, I never really liked surprises, "I wonder what it is?" Pandora asked, I shrugged and Lily elbowed me trying to get me to be social, "it might just be a quiz," Sirius groaned, putting his head on Remus' shoulder.

I wondered if he had ever stained one of Remus' jumpers with the mass amount of eyeliner he wore. I asked Remus if he wanted to be my partner as I hadn't gotten to really speak to him but he shrugged me off.

"As we are going through old spells," the professor started, pulling a sheet off a cupboard, "I found a boggart for us to practice on," We were all forced to line up, it made me sick to imagine what mine might be, there were a hundred things that had happened in the past five months I didn't want to re-experience. I stood at the back of the line, I hoped class would end before it got to my turn.

The first few had laughable fears that the class could joke about; tomatoes, a certain teacher, seahorses giving birth. Lily's was a snake swallowing It only seemed to get less funny though. Marlene was Dorcas leaving her, Peters was all of us laughing at him.

Sirius was alone in the dark his became a party, Remus' was the moon at least it wasn't a giant bloody wolf. James was the only one before me, his kept changing from our corpses Sirius to Remus to Peter and then it froze on me. I felt sick, I turned away covering my mouth. I had almost died multiple times and now I finally saw what would I would have become. I took my wand out and thought riddikulus removing the image. I took a deep breath, before I walked out.

I was almost sick as I reached the prefects bathroom, I scrunched my eyes shut but I couldn't stop it. Suddenly every death I wasn't able to stop last year flashed passed me. The long nights of trying to get to sleep, I grabbed my sleeves, pulling them down before curling my fist.

All the faucets in the room started, I started rubbing my face with my hands. I tried to control my breathing, I curled up. I felt like crying and being sick all at once as I rocked on the floor. I used to have Rosie to help me.

"Clemsy," a ghost who looked about my age said swooping down, poking me her hand going through my torso. I jumped up, trying to push the ghost away. I'd seen them before in Hogwarts but I tried to avoid them, my mother always said she had hated ghosts. I shook my head rapidly. "I suppose you're right, Clemsy would be old by now but who are you then," she said trying to touch me again but I dodged her hand.

"Who are you," I asked my previous mood forgotten as I tried to stay away from the ghost.

"It's Myrtle, Clemsy"

"I'm not Clemsy," suddenly it clicked, "do you know my mother is Cosette Clemente,"

"How is she,"

"She's dead,"

"Oh, is that why you were crying,"

"No,"

"Oh, why were you crying,"

"It's none of your bloody business,"

Suddenly James burst through the door, "go away you stupid ghost," the boy said, Myrtle let out a sob before flying into the sink, "are you okay Ris," James asked putting his hand on my arm.

"I just didn't like seeing my corpse James, that's all," I said pushing past him. James tried to follow me, "go back to Gryffindor James okay, I just need to send a letter," I said, James left me alone as I stormed to the owlery.

I wrote to Rosie, I told him about his brother adding his brother's note and then I lied, and I told him that nothing was wrong. I sealed the letter with red wax, before attaching it to an owl with silk so as not to hurt the owl's leg.

*POV switch: JAMES POTTER 𐂂*

"Are we all just going to pretend, Iris is fine," I said lying on my bed as we planned a prank unable to focus on the plan.

"She'd ask for help if she needed it," Pads said, who was far too busy to actually look up as he checked the times for when the library was free of the librarian.

"She wouldn't," Remus corrected

"I don't think she'd like it if she found out that we were talking about," Peter said quietly
"But she's-," I started sitting up, leaning forward

"Prongs leave it," Sirius warned, he was annoyed
"She's your sister,"

"And she's fine,"

"Something happened when she was away,"

"Yeah, when she left. She'll talk about it when she's ready,"

"How long till she's ready?" I asked, before turning back to to the supply list, resting my chin on my palm as I was lying on my stomach.

*POV switch: Iris Artemis Black 𓆙*

I skipped dinner, and just sat in front of the fire reading, I really missed Louis. The fire started to roar louder suddenly, then it spoke my name. I put the book down immediately, it was Rosie's head in the fire. I smiled at the boy sitting on the floor in front of him."You can't even write a good lie, how are you a spy?" He said laughing at me.

"I just had a few bad moments, that's all," I said running my hand over the carpet as I spoke to him, "your brother has adjusted so well though he did ask me to sneak him a book from the restricted section. Ravenclaw's are despicable,"
"Potter could help you," Rosie suggested if a bit harsh on the consonants as he spoke.

"I don't need help,"

"Okay, Rissie,"

"You're annoying when you do that,"

"And you're annoying when you do that," suddenly Louis's head came into view. I wanted to stroke my cat, "he misses you," Rosie said scratching the panthers chin as if it were a house cat.

"Have you eaten anything," he asked me, I shook my head. I felt guilty when he sighed. There was a knock on my door and suddenly he was gone. I sighed, I didn't even stand up I just flicked my wand at the door.

"Iris, are you in here," I thought it was going to be Lily or James, I stood up looking at the girl she had a tray of food.

"Thank you," I said to the girl reaching for the banana on the tray.

"Lily asked me to bring it, she's really busy," I nodded again, "do you not like me," she asked suddenly, I put down the small piece of bread I had grabbed, she ticked her head at me keeping it slightly crooked waiting for an answer.

"I have no issue with you, I'm not trying to be rude,"

"Good, because i think we would be great friends (bien parce que je pense que nous serions de grands amis)"

"Maybe(peut être)" I said, smiling at her. We talked lightly in French until Pandora decided she needed to go. I lay back on the sofa, I probably should sleep in my bed but I didn't care to stand up.

—

I looked at myself in the mirror, my body was riddled with scars and I hated it. It made me feel awful about myself, scars were a picture of what you've done but I was ashamed of mine. Except for my stretch marks, they were slightly faded now but when light flicked to them they shined like lightning.

Someone knocked on my door and I used my wand to put on my uniform quickly. It was Pandora and Lily ready to escort me to breakfast. We sat with the marauders, I tried to speak to Remus again but he blatantly ignored me.

"Ris, the match is in a few days. Are you coming?" James asked me,  ignoring the fact that I was rude to him yesterday.

"Wouldn't miss it for the world," I said, pouring myself tea.

"Potions, partners Ris," Lily asked me

"It's fine, Lils. But we have to be charms partners," she nodded, stealing my bacon and placing a slice of her toast on my plate.