The Azillian Princes(3)

CHAPTER 7

Xenia

    The one thing Xenia never understood about the dark place she called a world was the fact that people always needed someone to blame for their own inefficiencies, their losses, their pain, their sorrows or even their sadness.

She believed that if something happened to you as a person, you ought to live it just like she had continued to do everyday of her life regardless of how uneasy it always seemed.

Then again people had it as a second nature, it couldn't be helped no matter how much they tried.

  They always needed someone to blame.

It was now more like a need, a tendency, something they just had to do and indeed they were doing it.

Sadly she could never catch a break even in her catatonic state, although no one had come to confront her about the matter she had heard how the people kept wondering why the oracle had done nothing to stop the death of Melissa.

Sadly they had all wondered if she had let it happen because she was jealous of Melissa's place in the life of her mates.

Their reasoning had reminded her the reason she always avoided people generally, why would she let a person die just so she could get her mates back knowing fully well that they thought nothing of her.

Thankfully she had tapped into her Lycans spirit that roamed the land right on to watch her family answer the people's questions and even went as far as showing them a video obviously gotten from the CCTV in that hallway.

Her beast had been terribly angered because this was the second time the people were doubting her intentions, they seemed to always believe her whenever there was strong evidence vindicating her and for that her heart had broken all over again.

Doubt, rejection, misunderstanding, fear of tomorrow, sadness, pain, judgment and loss were emotions that now engulfed her aura no matter how much she tried to prevent them.

Unfortunately for her five days had passed already before she was able to wake up again.
It's not that she could even move an arm but she just had to because as the oracle she still had to conduct the funeral and that had to be the most difficult thing she could ever do in all of her existence.

It's not like she had wanted that woman to die or anything but why did she have to be the one to pray for an easy passage for her to the after life when she knew too well that The female had been the chief architect of all her woes since time immemorial.

Life was unfair and it seemed to invent new ways to punish her at every moment in time.

Some hours later she had arrived the hall right on time to see how much sorrow engulfed her mates and to top it all, it was all for the female that never even got their marks, this life was really hard to understand.

She had ignored their hateful glares and walked right past the people who were sending her both pitiful and apologetic glances till she arrived the podium and rested her palm on the empty casket.

In sincerity and pureness of heart she had made the prayer, performed her duties without bias and motioned for the end of the service and yet her mates hadn't stopped glaring at her.

She definitely understood how they were feeling  how they were feeling because she was feeling quite a lot of different emotions, guilt more than the rest.

Thankfully the day had ended and it was time for dinner, she was hungry but yet so nervous she could throw up.

She finally understood that her mates kept glaring at her because it seemed like they were blaming her for everything that happened to Melissa, if only she could change anything she would have, at least both not for anything else, just for the sake of their happiness.

Gradually with the aid of Elaine, Xenia arrived the dinning room and just like always went straight to the sit between her father and mother, intentionally avoiding the men who hadn't stopped glaring at her,  looking between them she finally noticed the now empty sit between them which made her heart clench with a more intense kind of guilt.

She wished she could make it any better  but how could she when she has experienced everything first hand what happens whenever she tried to help them in the past.

    "Enough"
Her mother had tried to whisper but failed cause it came more like her yelling and  that attracted everyone's attention to her.

   "It was not your fault Xenia, please just this once stop"
Her mother whispered dejectedly before rising to her feet and running out of the room in tears. While  her fathers rushed after their mate leaving Xenia with glaring alpha males.

She watched them leave and her heart broke the more cause now she could see that she was the reason her mother was now hurting, She had no plans of being in the presence of anyone else so she dropped her cutleries and rushed out of the dinning hall and began running to her own chamber except she never got the chance to reach it.

   "Are you happy now?"
Came Xyon's voice from the other side of her door.

    "Did you hate her so much that you are willing to kill her?, all for what Xenia?"
This time Xavier asked.

    "Or did you think we would ever pay attention to someone like you?"
Xerxes spat quite disgusted with her.

In that moment Xenia had finally felt the weight of her inability to forcefully stop Melissa from leaving.

Were they right?, Did she intentionally let Melissa  travel because some part of her wanted her out of the way?,  but what could she have done?,  she was weak, she is still weak from the mating process they shared with Melissa so what strength was she supposed to use in holding her back?, she had been slapped and ridiculed in her quest to make Melissa wait so how was it her fault?.

But she should have insisted, she should have begged, she should have yelled for help, she should have invited her fathers in that moment, maybe they would have used their position as Kings to stop her from leaving.

In that moment, Xenia had made two realizations that she concluded had to be the truth.

The first was that she was a murderer and the second was that she didn't deserve to live.

Come rain, come sun, Xenia didn't see the essence of existing if she was the reason her own mates might never be happy again.

    "I'm Sorry I Didn't Do Enough To Stop her"
Were the only words she could choke out before falling to the floor as a result of the absolute exhaustion she felt.

Thick tears had escaped her eyes while she tried crawling towards her mates in hope of their forgiveness but in return they scoffed at her and walked away while she yelled for them to please come back.

Over and over again her heart had shattered and her body had become so battered that one could hardly recognize the once flawless skinned female.

In her heart, life was no longer worth living and she could careless if she died at this point.

At the end of the day, all she knew was that she was nothing but a joke in the eyes of fate and she had no plans of begging them anymore, they were free to keep toying with her and they could take her life whenever they thought it to be useless in their schemes