Why Here?

Chapter 7

He just kept repeating it. Over and over again. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry." He sounded like a broken record on vinyl. My crying slowed with slight gasps for air. "Why?" I asked "you weren't even there. You don't even know me." I said softly "Because that isn't something anyone should go through. Especially you." He whispered. I pulled away. "Especially me?what does that mean? That I'm not a strong enough person to handle that? That I was stupid for it?!" I don't know what came over me but the fact he felt sorry for me made me angry. "No! That's not what I meant at all." His eyes in shock at my outburst. "Then what did you mean?!" My heart was racing faster and faster. "I just meant that you're so sweet and kind and you did all this for your mum. I just couldn't believe you had to go through that. But you did it for the best reason that could come to mind." His eyes fell back onto how fumbling hands. I sighed "I'm sorry..." I mumbled so quietly he barely heard it. "I'm just gonna go back to my room." He said quickly standing up and walking out. I fell to my bed. What was wrong with me. He hasn't said one rude thing to me and I treat him like he's dirt. I sat up and grabbed my journal. I opened it up to the clean page.

Day 37

'The eyes. The lips. The nose. Images not easily erased from my memory. The way his eye lashes touch the top of how eyelid. The long black brushes fold together with every blink. His voice mellifluous and genuinely kind. He's the only guy I've met that at the first sight of me didn't offer me a price. Something about him makes me fall. The way his rough hands left with the marks from his guitar run through his quiffed hair. The way his legs shake when he's nervous and that crooked little smile that appears at the side of his mouth when he's embarrassed. Something about him makes my anger and my hate for this place be forgotten.' I finished writing and closed the journal. I slid it into my sweater pocket and walked slowly to his room knocking on the door. "Come in." He said lifelessly. I took a deep breath and opened the door. His eyes widened and he moved aside on the bed. "May I show you something?" I asked softly. He nodded his head keeping his eyes on the sheets. I pulled my journal out and opened it to the page. "Here read it." He grabbed the journal hesitantly. His eyes moved from left to right and his lips mouthing each word written. A small smile escaped his lips. He looked up at me with sparkles in his eyes. "I thought I'd give you one since you gave me one." I smiled softly. He put the journal down and stood up slowly. His hands reached for mine, I gave in and let him pull me towards him. "I don't get nervous." He smiled softly. "Yes you do." I laughed. His mouth formed a crooked smile "there it is." I smiled. His cheeks turned almost a bright pink. His eyes flickered from my eyes to my lips. I moved closer. My nose nudged his. His lips touched mine with a soft peck. I smiled when he didn't pull away, instead he moved closer and pressed a warm soft kiss on my lips. All I could do was smile under it. He pulled away slowly. "Thank you." He whispered.