Accept Me

Chapter Five

HYUK JAE

What the hell do I do now?

She's not wrong, it's better if we build a friendship.

Except...I want her. Even if we weren't in this manufactured situation she's someone I would find really appealing. There haven't been any women I've felt this way about. Well, maybe Song Ah fleetingly when we were young, but not like this. The feelings I'm developing for Kimi are intense in a way that's exciting and uncomfortable.

I don't know if I want to run to her or away from her. I do know that something about Kimi appeals to me deep down on a visceral level. She's interesting and smart and witty. She's beautiful and calm.

She was talking about her work last Saturday night and the way she goes about discussing it is so engaging that everyone gets into the conversation. I could tell Arthur had had these kinds of talks with his sister a thousand times and loves it as much as she loved it when he turned the conversation to the work he was doing on his latest novel.

Arthur writes mystery novels and often Kimi and Hedda help him with their combined knowledge of science and law. Hedda is an attorney, she works on several different kinds of international cases and, making Kimi even more captivating, she has a serious grasp of both Hedda and Arthur's work. She's encouraging of them and, listening to them together, I found myself wondering what it would be like to have someone like Kimi love me and support me too.

Which leads me back to the point.

She's right. We're better off building a friendship that's strong and results in loyalty. Even that would be more than most couples in our situation end up having. Some have the polar opposite, in fact.

It's just...the idea of Min Ri, who's actually a really good guy, laying a hand on Kimi makes me totally mental. Like, cut the hand off that touched her deranged.

So, how do I convince my fiancée to take a chance on dating me?

We didn't get off on the right foot, which I totally own but it's a hard thing to actually fix. Her first impressions of me are pretty bad.

Kimi walks past me, gives a little wave, and heads down the hallway opposite where I'm standing.

I follow her and put my foot in the door as it starts to swing closed behind her.

"Are you okay?" I ask her, it's strange that she's come inside when I can hear the party still going on.

"I don't really feel like socializing anymore," she tells me, smiling slightly from where she's flopped on her bed.

"Hmmm," I watch her switch on the TV and flip around aimlessly for a half a minute.

"What do you feel like watching?" I ask her.

"I don't know. Something mindless, I guess, nothing too serious or sad," she rolls her eyes and I know just what she means. Mindless can be so good, but then clever and funny is better I think.

I put my hand out and she gives me the remote, head tilted challenging me to come up with a show she wants to watch.

I find Running Man and select a favorite episode, one of the ones where it's very physical and they cheat and stab each other in the back in really funny ways.

Tossing the remote to her I close her door and make myself at home on her floor. She looks at me, sighs, and gets off the bed. Walking to the TV she makes it turn until it's swiveled to face the little sofa and chairs in front of the wall of windows on the far side of her room. She looks beautiful with the lights of the city lighting up the night behind her, I take a mental picture, storing it away to think about later and pull out in the future when I need something to feel happy about.