Amnesia

CHAPTER 11

A week had passed since Justin and Jameson met each other. Medyo naging awkward nga lang nung time na 'yon kaya agad ko na ring inaya na umuwi si Justin.

And as days passed by, tuwing kailangan kong pumunta sa studio ay lagi akong hinahatid at sinusundo na ni Justin. Hindi ko sinasabi sakaniya verbally kung gaano ako kasaya non pero alam naman niya ata.

Sa ngayon ay nandito lang kami sa bahay. Justin is upstairs, he's in his room, may ginagawa.

It's already lunch and I just finished cooking and preparing our food. Naalala ko lang, I am not like this, I'm not used in preparing food dahil dati sa bahay ay may maid naman. But now that Justin and I are in a new place, new house, at kaming dalawa lang naman ang magkasama ay kailangan kong kumilos.

"Jah, lunch is ready. Let's eat." sambit ko nang puntahan ko si Justin sa kwarto niya.

Without looking at me, he just nods his head as an answer. I just waited for him at lumapit naman kaagad na siya sa akin at sabay na kaming bumaba.

We started eating quietly. Not until Justin asked me something that made my brows furrowed a bit.

"Kamusta?" he asked.

I looked at him with my brows furrowed before answering.

"Obviously, I'm fine." I said. "Bakit mo natanong?" tanong ko rin sakaniya.

"I mean kamusta tayo dati? Nung wala pa akong Amnesia."

I stilled in my position in my seat, natigil din ako sa pag kain. I gulped so many times. Simula na ba 'to ng pagtatanong niya tungkol sa nakaraan niya?

"A-Ah, w-we were good, we were happy back then." I said nervously.

Iyon lang ang mga salitang lumabas sa bibig ko.

I didn't expect that he would ask me now questions like that, about his past. Sana naihanda ko man lang ang sarili ko kahit papaano.

"How are we as a couple?" he asked again.

I guess I have to make up a story again? I'm not yet ready for him to know the truth. Selfish na kung selfish but I want him to be with me always.

"We're just like the normal couples out there." I said while I continued to eat, trying to act normal in front of him para hindi siya magduda.

"But we were bestfriends for a very long time right? Since childhood?" I just nodded as a response. I heared him sigh kaya napatingin ako saglit sakaniya. He has a small smile plastered on his face na ikinatulala ko nang saglit. "Diba, people always says that the best relationship starts off as friendships."

I admire his smile when he said that.

I'm sorry Jah, for lying. But I promise to tell you the truth, when the time comes that I'm ready.

I immediately called Freyja when the night time comes. Hiwalay naman kami ni Justin nang kwarto at nasa loob naman ako ng banyo nang kwarto ko nang tawagan ko si Freyja kaya hindi niya ako maririnig. Isa pa, hindi siya basta-bastang pumapasok dito sa kwarto ko nang hindi kumakatok.

I waited for Freyja to answer my call because it took her a while. Weird lang, sumasagot naman siya kaagad kapag tumatawag ako.

Sa ganitong pagkakataon, si Freyja lang talaga ang natatawagan ko.

Naghintay pa ako ng ilang saglit bago tuluyang nasagot ni Freyja ang tawag ko. And when she did, agad akong nagsalita.

"Freyja." I uttered her name.

Instead of hearing her talk, I suddenly stopped and got confused when I heared her sobbed on the other line.

"W-Wait, are you okay? Umiiyak ka ba?" nag-aalala kong tanong.

"Y-Yes..." halos bumulong nalang si Freyja sa kabilang linya.

I know maybe I should be worrying about myself but right now, I'm more worried about my twin sister. Bihira lang siyang umiyak kaya nag-aalala ako kapag ganitong umiiyak siya.

"Why? What happened? Anong problema?" I softly asked.

"Sorry Eya... Stell and I just got into a little fight." Freyja said as she sobbed.

As far as I know, she and Stell rarely got into a fight like this, yung puntong ganito na umiiyak na si Freyja. So I wonder what happened.

"Ba't kayo nag-away? Ano yung pinag-awayan niyo?" pagtatanong ko. Hindi ko naman pinipilit na sabihin niya sakin ng buo yung pinag-awayan nila.

"Ano kasi... These past few weeks madalang nalang kami magkita di gaya ng dati. Kasi diba, may trabaho rin ako, and him, he works as a choreographer sa isang dance studio diba." nanatili lang akong tahimik at nakinig lang. "Stell always excuse himself everytime aayain ko siya lumabas. Excuse niya palagi na busy siya dahil sa mga tinuturuan niya. Kaya ako kanina, since nainip ako, I went to their studio... Ineexpect ko na makikita ko roon yung mga tinuturuan niya ng sayaw pero hindi eh, wala nang katao-tao doon. Siya lang tapos may kasama pang babae..."

My brows furrowed.

I know why. I know what Freyja is thinking right now. Baka iniisip niya na niloloko na siya ni Stell at nambababae na siya.

Pero si Stell mambababae? No way. Hindi sa kinakampihan ko si Stell pero kaibigan ko rin siya, kilala ko na siya. I know how much he loves my twin sister at alam kong hindi niya magagawang saktan si Freyja.

"You're thinking na nambababae na siya?" mahina kong tanong sa kambal ko.

"Hindi ko maiwasang isipin..."

I sighed. I understand her. Kung ako nasa kalagayan niya alam kong iyon din ang mararamdaman ko.

"I understand... Pero nakausap mo ba siya? Baka naman kasi kaibigan niya lang 'yon o kasama niyang nagtuturo ng sayaw." sabi ko.

Parehas kaming saglit na natahimik. Then I remembered something about them, malapit na yung seventh anniversary nila, ngayon pa ba si Stell magloloko?

"Your 7th anniversary is coming, it'll be in a few weeks right? Ayusin niyo na dapat 'yan, mag-usap kayo." sabi ko pa.

"Yes, we will talk and we will fix this. Thank you Eya..."

I just smiled a little kahit hindi niya ako nakikita.

Wala akong dapat ipangamba ngayon sa kanila dahil alam ko naman na magkakayos sila. Ang tagal na nila, marami na silang napagdaanan.

"Napatawag ka nga pala?" nabalik ako sa ulirat nang muling magsalita si Freyja, magkausap pa nga pala kami.

Bumuntong-hininga muna ako bago nagsalita.

"Si Justin kasi, nagtanong na ulit siya sakin kanina kung kamusta ba kami noon. You don't know how nervous I am earlier, at nagsinungaling nanaman ako sakaniya..." my voice lowered down as I said that. "Freyja, it's like my conscience is haunting me, nakokonsensya na ako..."

"Why don't you tell him the truth already? Hindi sa pinangungunahan kita Freya pero naaawa na rin kasi ako kay Justin..."

"But I'm not ready yet. Kapag alam na niya yung totoo, iiwan na niya ako. Alam ko hindi lang kung anong meron kami ngayon ang masisira sa amin, kundi pati na yung pagkakaibigan namin noon. Ayoko non, I don't want to lose him..." I said as I started to cry a little.

Just the thought of losing Justin in my life, parang hindi ko kakayanin. Since then when we were still kids, magkaibigan na kami. Kaya hindi ko alam kung anong gagawin ko kapag nawala lahat ng pinagsamahan namin.

"I don't know what to do..." I uttered.

It's so hard to choose... Ang hirap mamili kung sasabihin ko na ba ang totoo kay Justin o iisipin ko nalang muna ulit ang sarili ko.