"There's always been two of you. A side I hardly remember and a side I hardly forget. All I can remember that I vowed never to forgive both sides, explain, what the hell am I doing here?"
"I think we should leave them here," said Rafe as he looked at Dune. The Pogues were asleep, grunting, groaning, being unable to differentiate between a nightmare and reality. What if they find them? Do I really want them dead? thought Dune. You act upon what you observe, the sun will rise and the roads will be clear, no one will know. Taking a look at them, she chuckled at the injustice of fate, she should be there with them. She can never escape it, that she's one of them.
"Keep driving Rafe, we can't leave them here." sighed Dune, she ran her hands through her hair and sniffed her skin, blood tastes like honey but it smells like dirt. She thought about the man with fear in his eyes, the way his smile turned agape, creating a cloud above her head. She glimpsed at the cloud then at the man, a cloudy sky loses its meaning without thunder, she's been told. The Twinkie kept growling the whole time, aching, and Rafe drove mindlessly, breaking its spine. But Dune had everything covered, a murderer may not leave a trace but a murderer never flees unprepared. She managed to sneak gas and oil and clothes in the Twinkie a night before going back to the crime scene. Knowing well that all eyes were on her, knowing well that she'll go back to the crime scene anytime soon, she took every precaution needed.
"You don't tell me what to do, when I say we leave them in the middle of fucking nowhere you say nothing. I could tie you to your Pogue and let one bullet pass from your head to his. You don't want to end up like Sarah, trust me." he said, holding her breath, sucking on air so he can have it all for himself, if he couldn't win his father's trust then he'll have to make the devil hate him until it begs for his trust. Dune hated to admit that she loved this side of Rafe, it's not like she's been waiting years for this. Dune always wondered what it feels like for two rough brains to move against one other, the slope and the space between their mouths, hearing his heartbeats poke her eardrums until she no longer hears her own voice. She could listen him talk forever, yell, hiss, curse. She didn't mind playing mutant, enlarging the lump in her throat.
She laughed, her laugh rang through his ears like the bells of that haunted church, where they blew candles every time they wanted to kiss, but they end up doing cocaine instead. She remembers it all, the way he'd snort the drug off her skin, the closest he's ever been with her. She wanted more, she wanted their eyes into melt into each other but she'll never know what he wants, no one knows. No one knows what goes on inside his head, noting new, his brain unfolds itself and crumbles then picks itself up without anyone's help. Little did he know that one of them had to survive, she's lying to herself. None of them will survive.
"You don't own me, country club." said Dune sternly, deep down she wished he'd mark his territory on her, in any way, but it wasn't that easy. Making him run away with her was her idea, giving him control was a bad idea. It hurtled, lying to oneself, loving the unloved, convincing oneself that she can change him. One's father never loved one's mother, and one's mother never loved one child, and one's child grew into a man, where one's man fell in love with a sinner. A sinner found himself in his lookalike, Rafe never had someone to call his own, even though he thought he had someone. People slip off Rafe's finger like raindrops, no one knows if they're going to live another day or not. She never thought of that, all she knew that if she were to die, she shall die before Rafe.
"I don't own you? I don't own you, you said?" he said, nodding his head. Letting go of the steering wheel, he turned to Dune, pulling her by her hair and bringing her face closer to his. His pupils expanded with the expansion of her lungs, the smell of cedar wood tickled her ribs, spitting in her lungs, she'd swear she saw a new galaxy forming just now. "I ruin what I own, and you're as insane as me. This is not a dream, we're here, you and i. I own everything I touch, see my hands in your hair? those billion molecules in the grip of my hand? all mine. You're all mine until I step on your grave, understand?"
"I thought you hated me," whispered Dune, she's contaminated by unnerving sensation of calmness, they could die any minute. All of them, along with the Pogues, they're skin on skin with death, and she wasn't flinching one bone. Her mind gave a command, urging her to hit the brakes and slap Rafe across the face. One breath and the world could explode, the Twinkie sighed in relief, been waiting forever to make a halt. She pushed Rafe away from her and got off the Twinkie, slamming the door roughly making her body shake, waking up the Pogues.
"God? is that you?" said Pope, She could hear Kiara groan.
"If it's God then why are we still in the Twinkie?" asked John B, proving a point. It didn't take Rafe too long to follow Dune, he gave the Pogues his signature death glare before slamming the door shut, as aggressive as Dune's.
"They're made for each other," said Sarah.
"Made of flesh and bone, they're walking stones. Hearts as cold as ice, they don't the world, they don't even need each other. They'll suck on your brain until you lose your memory, if you could differentiate between their death glares, then you're lucky because a part of your memory didn't fade into the universe. The universe on their side, I know."
"Woah, JJ. I didn't know you had a little poetic flare in you."
"Falling in love with a disguised saint turned me into that,"
She wanted to get as far as she could from Rafe, from the Twinkie, from her brother and his friends, from her surfer prince who's no longer hers. Everything she did for him, when he's not even hers. She wanted to set herself on fire, and look into Rafe's eyes, seeing fear, knowing quite well he won't throw himself in to save her. When she almost drowned herself to save him, killed the love of his life, cut their heart strings and hid them under her teeth.
"Dune! Where do you think you're going? You can't run away from me." He panted, kneeling to catch a breath. Turning around, she watched the world fall from his eyes. No one runs away from Rafe Cameron, no one can escape him, those who want to and those who don't. Shame fell from her lips as she parted them open, she didn't know what to say. The sleepless nights and constant driving, racing with time as if the grand apocalypse is happening tomorrow and all they need is once chance to start over, to live.
"Don't you ever get sick and tired of standing under the rain for too long? My bones are melting, Rafe. Ever since we stepped in that stupid van together it's been raining non stop over my head. We witnessed the forbidden affair between the moon and the shooting star, we watched the world wake up and fall back to sleep, we drove for miles to count. I just need to take a breath and I can't you that around you, as if I need a ticket to heaven and even if I ever get it it's not like I'll take it, it'll be handed to you. I'd rip my heart into pieces and sneak a piece into your pocket, okay? If I ever wanted to run away from you I wouldn't have came back to paradise in the first place."
"Why are you doing all of this? I'm nothing special."
"If you know, they'll never leave me alone."
YOU ARE READING
COUNTRY CLUB
Fanfiction"Before you could break my heart, it'll be at your step, in pieces, right before you know it." Dune lives with several identities, one of them gave up the ghost, smeared Dune's hands in blood. Dune, is that her real name? What does she have to hide...
