COUNTRY CLUB

THIRTY FIVE

This is not for you to read, but i know you're doing to read it anyway. This is for me. Where are you now? Are you still with him or did he turn his back on you? Who killed who first? And if you were to die first, would he write it down? or would it be tale to tell Dune? Would our graves e next to each other? What if i die drowning? Will he search for my body? Did you keep your promise? How did he handle the truth? Did he walk on the moon with you? Was it easy for you to read the lies between the lines or did you let him blind fold you? Have you made it to the unknown, did you set it on fire? Are you still chased by Ward? Does Rafe look at you the same way after knowing the truth? Did he call you by your name? You don't have to answer right away, I know you well. What if I couldn't find answers for all these questions? I have been spending countless days and hours exploiting ink on paper, thinking that a piece of paper would keep me safe. Then I remember that I'm never safe, I wasn't supposed to be protected.

"I'm not leaving for long, believe me. I could never handle being far from you for long. I can't stay away from you, you're addicting. You're addicting to an extent that if I didn't leave now, I can't promise I'd stay forever. But I want you, I wanted you the day you came back. The first time I touched you you told me that you saw stars, I don't want any of these stars to explode. I didn't lie when I said that I loved you, if you loved me as much as I loved you then you would let me go. What's stopping you from not letting me go? You don't trust me? I am not my father, I proved it to you." He lied through his teeth, hiding Ward's ghost by throwing his hands in the air, trying to make sense when nothing around them waited for logic to fix their mess. The ship was about to sail, the waves waited for no one, it's either the long way home or none at all. She was looking at Ward's legacy, who's screaming at her with his teeth falling everywhere. Every lie costs a tooth, and he was running out of teeth.

"We started this together, and we'll end it together. Give me one valid reason to stay here and wait for you. Would you bother telling what I'd be waiting? Days will pass by and you'll forget I existed, you'll continue what Ward couldn't finish, you'll rip yourself off love because all you care about is money. You're a money hungry motherfucker just like your father, your mind couldn't forget the gold but it made you forget the death of your lover. I tried to deceive you into seeing the world for more than just money and drugs and neglect, I tried to win you desperately. I punished myself by not eating so you could eat because you were haunted by the idea of being aware of your surroundings. You cannot escape me, otherwise you have to kill me."

Thinking of the reasons, there was none. He's dying to see her again, he wanted to take her with him. But if Rose knew Unela was alive, she'd kill him. Rafe had been communicating with Rose via invisible ink, sending him the smallest portions of stardust in exchange of nothing. Rafe's mind worked as the following; I must always win, and make the other side believe they're winning too. The other side would be lured into false information, on hold luxuries, fake promises, just like Barry. "You've got me where you want me, I'm going to give you what you want."

She tucked a breath in and closed her eyes, she thought of the seven minutes that'll flash in front of her eyes, she thought of the bullet that'll run through her body any minute, it'd hurt less than his lips on my skin. Which was true, Rafe's lips left bruises and burns all over her skin, turning into a canvas painted with tinted spit, a drunken artist who chose to scream at the stainless portrait. He hated how soft her skin is, her soft skin that makes him fall on his knees, assuring him that she'll give him all the love of the world; even if he didn't deserve it.

He trailed the gun and pointed it towards her forehead , making her look up at him. He hated how innocent she looked when she looked up to meet his eyes, it held him by the throat. Don't say it one more time, don't repeat it, don't ask me to kill you. I don't want to kill you, i want to hold your hand and kill everyone on this ship instead. I want to kill you with my kisses, with my tongue gilding over yours, with my teeth fighting your teeth for dominance. i want you to taste your own blood instead of having you drown in it. Don't push my buttons, I want to crown you. You are the empress of this island.

"What are you waiting for?"

Don't pull the trigger, stay with me, let's kill everyone but each other. Give me another chance, tell me what do to and I'd drop down on my knees for you. What we have must not end, I'll crown you, I'll sell my soul for you. Forgive me for everything I've done. I could feel the upcoming days crawling on my skin like sickness. I only want your touch, I want your brain to moan over mine, electrocute everyone with our wicked minds. Don't believe everything I say, I want to look into your eyes forever. Don't kill me, how would I be able to escape you then?

"You want to continue this journey on your own, then what's the point of my existence then? Come on, shoot me."

"Your wish is my command, Unela."

The gun squeaked like fireworks, it's just that it's a fatal fire doing the wrongful work.